Phan One-Shots
by gum wrapper
Summary: Just some random AmazingPhil and danisnotonfire fics. Usually short but some are longer.
1. They've Seen Too Much

I don't own Danisnotonfire and Amazingphil and this work is fictional (but who would complain if it wasn't?)

* * *

They've seen too much

Dan's p.o.v.

"Hey guys, Dan here, and thanks for watching another YouNow of mine." I pause to look at Phil who is sitting beside me. "And today joining us is a very special guest."

Phil slides into the camera view. 'Hello!"

"So what are we going to take about today, Philip?" I ask watching him closely.

"Let's see what the chat says! Hmm… oh, Jenny K. says 'Dan, when are you posting the video you said you'd put up last Thursday?'" Phil reads.

I give a tiny embarrassed laugh and look at the floor. "Um, once I edit it?"

"Dan! You told me you were almost finished!" Phil accuses.

"I got… distracted! You know me and my procrastination habits."

The comments fill with notes on how cute Phan is being and scolding me for lying to Phil.

"Lets just move on, okay, Lauren-the-kitty says 'why do you two look like you haven't slept in a week?' that is a good question! We really haven't been sleeping. A lot of tour and book stuff going on right now." Phil asks and answers. I yawn behind him as the comments keep going.

We answer dozens of different questions and go off on tangents about various things but I almost fall asleep at one point and Phil laughs before he checks the time.

"Why hasn't anybody said anything? We've been going on forever! Don't you have lives or are you really all just a bunch of lizards?"

I laugh tiredly. "It's only been fifty minutes!"

The comments reply with 'we love you guys!', 'don't leave us', and 'Dan, you NEED to sleep!' as well as many more.

We look at each other and then I shrug. "Okay, then we're going to call it a night… thanks for watching!" I mumble and yawn.

I keep my laptop open but just stare beside it at lost in thought. I just sit there.

"Come on, you can't sleep on the floor." Phil says standing to go to his room.

"I just want to keep sitting here. It's cozy with you so close."

"You need to sleep. It doesn't matter where." He implies.

I looks up from the floor and smirk.

Phil kisses me swiftly. I just get a taste of his lips before he pulls away and is already going to his room.

I sits there for a minute longer still lost in thought and then looks up at my laptop to turn it off. I see something that makes my lungs stop. My heart doesn't stop beating but thuds heavily instead.

I had failed to log off the live show and most people were still watching and had seen the flirting and kiss.

"Phil!" I call as I frantically log off the live show, shut the computer down, and then close it for good measure.

"What?" Phil calls coming back into the room in his pajamas.

"We-I forgot to log off the live show and… They've seen too much, we can't joke about it or say anything like that."

"They saw me-" He just trails off as I nod.

Phil gives a tiny shrug. "I mean, we had to tell them some time didn't we? Maybe this way was easier."

"They've seen too much." I repeat in shock. "They know."


	2. Why Was This Game Invented?

Based off the DanandPhilGAMES video with the always fun Can Your Pet? Also, thank you kymberleycool for following and favoriting! ~gum wrapper.

I don't own Danisnotonfire, Amazingphil, or Can Your Pet? … Oh well!

* * *

Why Was This Game Invented?

"Hello, Dan and Phil Games pumpkin patches!"

"Yes, we're here for day three of spooky week and today, we're playing… actually I don't know what we're playing." Dan says turning to Phil.

"I thought we could play a cute little game I found online." Phil says with a quick glance at the camera.

"That's not a video game!" Dan protests fixing the hood on his "spooky" sweatshirt.

"Come on, I think you'll like it!" Phil says with a smirk. He opens a tab and starts typing on the computer. "I watched a video where they played this."

"Okay, we are playing… C-Can Your Pet?" Dan looks up confused. "What the hell is Can Your Pet!? What does it mean, Can Your Pet? Am I supposed to figure out what the pet can do?"

"I guess we'll unravel those mysteries Dan and I think you should control this one."

"Okay, um, I have to name it." Dan says still uncomfortable looking. "Susan 4," Dan laughs quickly, "no. Okay… um, Tweety. The least creative bird name ever."

Phil starts typing. He misspells tweety with far too many w's.

"Yes, blame the keyboard." Dan says rolling his eyes as Phil retypes blaming Dan's keyboard.

"Okay, Oh, hello.." Dan says as the chick appears in the small graphic room. "Aw, he follows the mouse!"

"Dan, you can now accessorize him." Phil says moving things along.

Dan finds some messy hair and big round eyes. He gives Tweety a Wildcats shirt and then a scar because it is spooky week after all.

Phil continues to educate Dan on the game and soon Dan's playing a little game of header with a football (or American soccer ball).

"I think you're supposed to ride the bike." Phil says biting his tongue.

"I don't want to do any exercise… even though this game we've got going on is rather like exercise."

"Yes, well, what if he needs it?" Phil says urging Dan to press the button.

Dan moves so the mouse is hovering over the icon. In a quick second Phil gives a smirk to the camera and then a slightly worried glance at Dan who has become quite involved in the little chick.

Dan clicks without another thought. A tiny smile on his lips. And then the bike flips over. The wheels transform into spiked blades and Tweety falls onto them. Tweety comes out as various chicken parts.

Phil is still smirking a little but Dan's eyes get big. He watches in silence. "What." Dan mumbles.

Phil smiles and his tongue goes to the corner of his lips. Dan unfreezes and suddenly time catches back up.

"What was that?! What the ever loving fluff was that?!" He rounds on Phil. "You knew that was going to happen! You let me spend enough time with it to get attached!"

Phil laughs. "Well it is spooky week, Dan."

"I forgot there were decorations behind us! I thought we were just playing a nice game and you were like 'press the bike' and 'he needs to ride the bike.'"

They finish their video and then Dan scowls. "You are the reason Tweety is dead."

"I am not! You clicked on the button!"

"Why was this game invented?" Dan asks leaning his head on Phil. "It's horrible."

Phil can't tell if Dan is being serious or not so he just laughs and says "It's only a game, love."


	3. Just A Game

So, I had parent teacher conferences this week. My mum went and my Honors English teacher said "(my name) should really work harder on (gender word) essays." If I wasn't the total shy and cripplingly socially awkward kid I am I would show her my fan fiction and be like "LOOK AT THIS! I'M WORKING HARD ON THIS AND NOT ESSAYS ON MY HAPPY PLACE AND YOU WONDER WHY?!" because clearly this has a bit more substance than essays on my happy place. ~ gum wrapper.

I DO NOT OWN DANISNOTONFIRE OR AMAZINGPHIL!

* * *

Just A Game

Dan's p.o.v.

"Okay, it's dark outside, Phil isn't here, there could be insane people anywhere from here to your room, and you can't find the lightswitch." I say looking out the door from the gaming room. "Just breathe and turn on your phone. It'll be fine, you can do it, just walk forward-" A noise comes from down the hall. "Nope! NOPITY, NOPE, NOPE!" I turn back around and sit on the couch in the office/gaming room.

I'll just spend the night here.

If no murders show up to kill me that is.

See, this is one of the reasons why I need Phil. If there's a noise in the middle of the night Phil will go check it out. Phil would just turn on the light and then see that it was only the flat setting or the wind banging on the window or a stack of video games falling over… How did they fall over? Phil always seems to look past that part while I would love to know how a stack of inanimate objects moved when no one touched them after sitting on the floor for months. Was it a ghost? A demon? How does this happen?

I slowly lay down with the lights on and stare at various flashing lights on the computer and all the different things me and Phil have around the desk. What if something was watching me from under the desk?

"There's nothing under the desk, Dan. You've been sitting there for hours." I chide myself. "Phil will be back in a day so he can figure out what the sound was and turn all the lights on. You'll be fine."

The floor creaks from the hallway and then a thud like someone is setting something heavy down echoes. An odd muffled sound comes after.

My heart speeds up and tears actually prickle my eyes. There is something (or someone) in the flat for certain.

I remain on the couch as my breath starts to come out in gasps and another creak comes from the hallway it's coming closer.

I'm tempted to call out. Maybe it's the landlord making a late visit?

I hear another door close. It sounds like the glass kitchen door. Everything is silent for a while.

I am hyperventilating now and my eyes water. I will not cry! This has to just be my imagination.

Suddenly I feel like I'm was playing Outlast in real life. I hear another muffled sound and another door close. It is coming up the stairs now and it must be looking for me.

I can't think of anything else to do so I quietly hide under the desk. I feel stupid but also more hidden. I suddenly wish the light was off.

Another creak. I've never realized how creaky the floor was.

"Dan?"

Oh God it knows my name! Shit, shit, I'm dead, I'm so dead, I'm sorry Phil!

"Dan?" It's whispering my name and coming closer.

I curl up as tight as possible and put my face into my knees. I shut my eyes waiting for pain or just death.

My heart is beating fast and in an odd rhythm. Am I going to have a heart attack?

"Dan, where the hell are you?" The whisper voice is male but I can't place it because of the whispering. There isn't enough vocal sound.

I stay dead silent (debating in my head if I should call Phil to say I am about to be murdered under the desk in the gaming room) except for my ragged breathing. It's like I'd just swam ten miles without stopping while having an asthma attack.

I curse and half pray. Silently I take my phone out and hurry to find (with shaky hands) Phi's contact.

"Dan? Are you in here?" I hear the door open to the gaming room and press the call button on Phil's contact.

A phone rings. IT STOLE PHIL'S PHONE?!

Phil answers and I hear his phone in the phone and room and I laugh at my stupidity. It wasn't a bloodthirsty murder, it was Phil. The least likely person to kill someone.

"Dan, what are doing under the desk?" Phil asks leaning down.

"Hiding from insane killers." I say blushing and crawl out.

Phil makes a confused face. "are no insane killers in the flat."

I mumble my response. "I thought you were one."

"What?"

"I thought… that you… were a murderer coming to kill me."

Phil laughs. "Why would you think that?"

I frown. "You think it's funny. I was playing a very scary game, in the dark, at night, and alone. Then, I heard you coming in a guess and kinda lost it."

His smile widens and he helps me off the floor and gives me a quick peck on the cheek. My heart rate spikes back up. "You always say I'm not scary." He laughs.

I feel the adrenaline starting to drain from me as we leave the gaming room. I know I'm going to fall into a deep sleep so I mumble something to Phil and go off to my room.

That's not where I stay though. I make my way to Phil's room so he can ward off amy possible nightmares.


	4. TRIGGER WARNING SORRY

I have no excuses for not updating….

I am so freaking JAZZED right now! I read _Boo_ by Neil Smith and it has changed my life. Honestly I can't express how the book has affected me. This chapter is an AU based off it and it might (the names are different so.. I DUNNO, IT'S YOUR CALL) spoil the book so please skip if you want to read one of the best books about friendship and love. PLEASE READ THE BOTTOM AUTHOR NOTE! ~ gum wrapper.

 _ **I DO NOT OWN DANISNOTONFIRE OR AMAZINGPHIL.**_

 _ **WARNING: TRIGGERING FOR SUICIDE AND CUTTING.**_

* * *

Phil's p.o.v. (only because the ending of _Boo_ was so mind tripping)

I've always been a happy person. Always smiling and holding doors for people. I apologize for something I didn't do and always do my best to please everyone.

I'm barely human anymore. It's taken over my life because my parents expect me to be perfect and just as good as my brother. Maybe even better because I'm the second one.

I barely think as I walk to school. As I make my way through the hallway. I remember how I was once forced to drink one of my bully's pee from a soda can after they'd already beaten me.

How I don't really have any friends. How no one has ever wanted to date me. How my parents think my life is fine. They didn't even know I packed my own lunch today.

They also don't know that I'm mentally unstable and didn't pack food for me to eat.

I packed my uncle's gun.

I open my locker. Number 106.

My brain stops working. I don't remember if I put my bag away or not. I place the lunch bag on a shelf. I don't remember taking out the gun.

I don't remember pointing at myself.

I remember faintly, the brown haired boy I was once friends with screaming my name and the word no.

page break

Dan's p.o.v.

I walk into the locker hallway. My wrists sting from the cutting I did last night as they rub against my shirt sleeve but I ignore it.

I look at locker 106. I do everyday. It's my (to use the girly term) _crush's_ locker.

I see something that scares me. Something that makes me act before thinking.

Phil. Has a gun. Pointed at his chest.

"PHIL, NO!" I shout running forward.

He doesn't look up. I tackle him. Wrestling, trying to get the gun away from him, anything to extend his life because I can't live without him.

He's not responding to my repeated whispers of "Phil, no. I need you. I need you to stay alive." **(A/N: This could be taken as in Dan needs phil in order for Dan to live or Dan just needs Phil to not kill himself. I like the first one.)** "Please, Phil give me the gun! Phil, I need you to stay alive! Listen to me! PHIL!"

And then there's a bang.

I don't know what happened after until we found each other in Town. And I knew more than him. I remember attacking him and trying to prolong his life. I know that I failed to do so.

I know he doesn't remember me whispering to him "Phil, I love you and that's why you can't do this."

* * *

First off, I'm thinking about writing a multi-chapter fic (I know, I know, I have too many going already!) where it's Dan and Phil in an edited version of this one. It would have to be under Web Shows because I looked and couldn't find the category option of _Boo_ and you can't crossover Web Shows and Books. :( **LET ME KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD IDEA! YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE THIS BLOODY BOOK! THANK YOU FOR GETTING IT FOR ME MUM!**

Secondly, OH! MY! ZIG! MY FIRST REVIEW! THANK YOU _KIGEN DAWN_! _**AND**_ other reveiws, new followers, and 100 views! Thank you all so much! A few quick notes: I probably should have used _FNAF_ instead of _Outlast_ in the last chapter, and I was rereading _Harry Potter and the Cursed Child_ (I'm going to try not to talk about it too much so PM me if you really want to discuss it) and I realized that Scorpius and Albus are EXACTLY like Dan and Phil (I ship Albus and Scorpius too... Stop judging me!)

Thanks for reading, sorry I'm still not updating properly (I'm trying to find the best in me so I often take a few days on pieces) I will work on it. I have vacation coming up so maybe I can get moving? ;) ~ gum wrapper.


	5. Moments

I don't own Danisnotonfire (Dan Howell) or AmazingPhil (Phil Lester) or 'Count On Me' by Bruno Mars. 

(Doesn't that song just fit them though? I think It does.) Also, sorry for the mentions of cutting, it's usually not my style but I thought it added something and this is kind of like a bunch of various moments.

* * *

That's What Friends Are Supposed To Do

If you ever find yourself stuck in the middle of the sea

I'll sail the world

to find you

"Dan, why do you do this to yourself?"

"I'm lost Phil. I'm stuck in a large void and I can't find the way out."

"I'll find you."

"I don't deserve you too."

"But I will. I'll find you wherever you are in that void. I'll find you even if I have to search the world."

If you're ever lost in the dark and you can't see

I'll be the light

to guide you

"What is life? Do I matter? When I'm dead one hundred years from now will the world still remember me?"

"Dan, get out of the darkness. It's eating you."

"I can't see any light anymore. It's gone away."

"The light?"

"The good stuff about living."

"Dan, you have our fans, your videos, your family, our friends…"

"But those are just stars and light bulbs. I need… the sun to get rid of this midnight fog."

"How poetic."

…

"What about me? Can I be your sun?"

…

"I think you already are. I think, Phil, you are my sunshine."

We find out what we're made of

When we are called to help our friends in need

"How am I your sun?"

"You're funny, bright, joyful, optimistic, happy-go-lucky, talented, kind-hearted, caring, my best friend… should I go on or do you get it?"

"Dan, I'm only those things because life is easier if you chose to live that way. When you think everything is happy, everything kind of is happy."

"Oh. I guess that makes sense."

You can count on me

like one, two three,

I'll be there

And when I need it I know I can count on you

like four, three, two

you'll be there

'cause that's what friends are supposed to do

"Thanks, Phil. You, you really have helped me."

"Of course. I know you'll help me when I'm down too. It's the way friendship works."

"Yeah. AmazingPhil can't be sad. It like, goes against science or something like that."

"Haha."

If you're ever tossin' and turnin' and just can't fall asleep

I'll sing a song  
beside you

"Phil!"

"Dan, it was just a bad dream, I'm right here."

"Yeah, yeah, I know but it always feels so real."

"I know. Do you think you can fall back asleep?"

"Not soon."

"What if I tell you a story or something?"

"Yeah, okay. That might help."

"Here we go then…"

And if you ever forget how much you really mean to me

everyday I will

remind you

"Phil, don't do this."

"Why? No one really likes me. All those hate comments prove it."

"Phil, you have to read the good ones. Only the good ones are the ones that truly matter."

"Do they?"

"Yes. Phil, people like you."

"More people like you than they like me."

"That's not fair."

"It's because you're so fun to be around Dan. With your humor and ideas. But no one wants to watch my videos or be near me."

"I do. I always do and always have. Always will too."

"How much? I mean, you can only act for so long before you leave me alone."

"I would never leave you alone. You mean… Phil, you mean so much to me. You are my sunshine, my medicine, my pick me up, you can drag me out of an existential crisis when nothing else can, you give me hope, you are my… Phil Lester, you are my everything and if you don't know it, I'll tell you every single day no matter what."

We found out what we're made of

when we are called to help our friends in need

You can count on me

like one, two, three,

I'll be there

and when I need it

I can count on you

like four, three, two,

you'll be there

"I think you're my everything too Dan."

"Good."

"Great, I've inflated your ego."

"Haha, shut up."

'cause that's what friends are supposed to do

oh yeah

You'll always have my shoulder when you cry

"I wish I could have talked to her one more time."

"I know. It's always hard when your mum dies."

"Why didn't you come to me when your mum died?"

"It wasn't s big a deal for me, Phil. We weren't as close."

"Oh. I'm sorry."

"She didn't like you Phil. Don't be the slightest bit sorry. She wasn't anything like your mum."

I'll never let go

never say goodbye

"So… you're going away for a… month."

"Yeah… I guess."

"Um, Dan, could I hug you? Just so-"

"Come here."

…

…

"I don't want to let go."

"Ha… Me neither."

…

…

"So don't go."

"What?"

"You heard me. Dan, don't get on the plane. Stay here. With me."

"My dad-"

"Has your brother. Who do I have if you go?"

…

…

…

…

"Fine. I'll stay with you."

"Yay."

"You spork."

You know you can count on me like

One, two, three,

I'll be there

and when I need it I can count on you like

Four, three, two,

I'll be there

"I think I love you."

"You think you love me?"

"I know I love you."

"Good because I love you. You massive spoon."

"Daaan."

"Phiiiil."

'cause that's what friends are supposed to do

Oh yeah

You can count on me 'cause I can count on you.


	6. I'm So Done

_The usual. No excuses, school's sucky, I'm failing this every(now other)day thing... Just read the chapter please. I hope you enjoy it._

 **I don't own AmazingPhil or danisnotonfire.**

* * *

"That's IT! I'm done! I'm soooo fluffin' done Phil!"

"Dan."

"I can't handle it anymore! If they are going to just watch our every move then maybe I don't want to do this anymore!"

"Dan, have reason." Phil laughs.

"No! I quit! I quit! It's not fun anymore!"

"Daaaan." Phil chides.

"Phil I can't stand it! The stress! The fear! What if we're found out?"

"What's the worst that could happen?"

Dan thinks for a minute. "We could die."

Phil rolls his eyes. "Just sit back down. You don't even have to think about it, I'll handle it."

"We'll just be killed faster that way!" Tears are actually visible in his eyes and Phil only laughs harder.

Phil looks at the camera. "Well, I guess this is the end of-"

"NO! No, I'll do it. I can handle it for just one more hour."

He laughs. "Dan. It's only Five Nights at Freddy's. We've played this dozens of times."

"BUT WE'RE ON THE LAST NIGHT AND IT'S THE LAST HOUR!"


	7. I Think That's Why

I don't own AmazingPhil or danisnotonfire still.

* * *

I Think That's Why.

Phil's p.o.v.

"We exchanged a lot of things, me and you. We exchange video tips, subscribers, favorite anime, clothes, filming equipment, kisses, cereal, colds(and other illnesses), friends, funny text messages, just about everything that people who are "just best friends" exchange.

Eventually, we both realized we weren't exchanging anymore. No, we were now sharing. Everything one of us had, the other had. People thought of us as one thing. We were DanandPhil. Not Dan-space-and-space-Phil. No, we are one name, one group effort, a combo, a duo, and a few hundred suspect, a couple.

But we don't care. We can't be happier to share our lives with each other. After all a best friend is a constant companion. Someone who is always there for you and knows your life story. Sure we do things without the other sometimes but we are always thinking of each other and sometimes even mentioning each other to people who ask about just the one of us.

I think that's why, Dan, I've come to love you."

Dan blinks as he takes in my words. My long paragraphs of our summarized shared story. As his brain registers my last words. My declaration of love.

"Oh." A smile creeps along his face. "I don't want to ever go back to being Dan-space-and-space-Phil. There's too much space between us."

I smile too. He looks down at our shoes and then continues. "And I love you too. For a long time. I've just always been far too scared to tell you."

"I know. You didn't exactly hide it well."

Dan blushes and I take pleasure in knowing I did that to him.

"Did you really think I wouldn't notice you always looking at me like that? I pointed it out in a live show once."

He turns a deeper pink. Almost red.

"It's fine of course. It helped me see you had the same feeling for me."

"You're rather handsome you know. It's hard to ignore it." Dan says still looking at our feet.

I laugh softly. "Don't forget that little thing you do with your tongue when you get jealous."

His face goes dark red. I'm never seen him blushing so bad.

"Don't worry though. I think it's cute when you get so jealous." Dan keeps looking down. I nudge his toes with mine. "What's wrong?"

Dan doesn't look up but mumbles "I tried so hard not to fangirl over you!"


	8. Hair Dye

_WOOP! LET'S DO THIS! If you can't tell, I'm back in the writing mood. :D ~gum wrapper._

 **I don't own AmazingPhil or danisnotonfire.**

* * *

Hair Dye

 _Dan's p.o.v._

I decided I had nothing better to do on a cold wintery Wednesday then dye my hair red. Why? I don't know. I just woke up, ate breakfast, all the usual stuff, and then realized I was bored and that I had red temporary hair dye in the bathroom from the punk edit video.

So I disappeared into the bathroom with a vague "I'll be back, uh, just gotta… shower. Yeah, shower." to Phil and got to work.

I set up everything, read the instructions about two times, put a towel around my shoulders, and then looked straight in the mirror.

"Don't fluff this up, Dan." I say and carefully raise my hand with the little thingy the hair dye was on.

I do the back with lots of struggle, the sides with some, and over course the top and my fringe are easy to do as my hand doesn't have to bend awkwardly. I finish, reread the instructions, and then pause.

Oh God. I suddenly remember why this unopened container is here. Why we used a different one in the video.

I hadn't read _all_ the instructions. No, I'd stopped just a bit too early. See, if I'd kept reading I would have seen that it wasn't temporary. It was freaking permanent hair dye. Phil must have read down more before the video. That's why we have an unopened bottle.

I inspect my hair again. I'd done a really thorough job so it was one hundred percent red and bright red at that. Not ginger, **RED.**

I swear loudly and then hear Phil. "Are you okay?"

"Uhhhhmmmm…." I say as I hurriedly put back the hair dye supplies and throw the towel on the floor in the corner.

Maybe he won't notice?

"What did you do?!" Phil cries as I open the door.


	9. Rain

_I've made a mistake(I do that a lot). I close friend of mine reads this and my other phanfiction so I am pressured to update more often now…. By myself conscious and their texting. *cough, hack, cough*_ **Hi, Will.** _*Cough* Actually, that's good news isn't it? I'll have more of a regular update track. YAY! ~gum wrapper._

 **I will never own AmazingPhil and/or danisnotonfire, and the umbrella is pretty cool but I don't think they own it, and I don't either.**

* * *

Rain

Phil's p.o.v.

I wait for as long as physically able before taking a step towards Dan. He moves closer in response.

The rain, bone soaking, freezing, hard as ice, and unrelenting pours around us as we walk through the park. We pass a playground and I see a long abandoned playground. It's sandbox turning to muck and the slides turning dangerously slippery. Dan jumps a little as a swing creaks in the wind.

"At least we have the umbrella." I say cheerily looking up through the see-through umbrella.

He nods and pulls his hood around his face tighter. "Otherwise we would be drowning."

We pass several worms as they escape their flooding whatever-the-heck-they-live-ins. I watch them escape into the dark green grass and Dan steps around them carefully. I wonder what the statistics are for worm survival rate when it rains is.

After several minutes of walking the rain decides to pound the umbrella harder and the wind picks up so our backs are getting soaked. Dan moves even closer to me. I shiver as I lean against him. Why didn't I wear a coat like him?!

"Hey, Philly, are you cold?" He asks. His voice is quiet but loud in the open park.

"I'll be fine. I can see the street we live on." I say trying to stop myself from shivering. Maybe he won't notice.

"No. We can't have AmazingPhil become FrozenPhil. Here, take my coat."

"No!" I cry. "You where it! I didn't bring mine, you did, so…" I'm rubbish at sounding mean, "you're going to wear it."

"Phil."

We stop walking and glare at each other. Dan has rain from his now-curly hair dripping down his face making him look rather sad. Our staring contest ends as I shiver violently and sneeze. Dan takes off his coat and puts it around my shoulders. I reluctantly put my arms through the sleeves. He smiles triumphantly and in return I stick my tongue out at him.

"What if a fan sees? Won't it be a give away?" I ask trying to change his mind.

Dan shrugs as he adjusts his grey hoodie. It's already soaked. I feel worse for stealing away his coat.

"We are almost home. If we rush there's a chance no one will even be outside. Besides, you're cold so does it really matter?" He ends with a kiss.

I pull away after a fair amount of time and turn my face into the wind so he won't see my face turning red. Maybe he'll just think it's because of how cold it is. Water drips down my cheek from my hair. I wipe it off with his coat sleeve.

We walk at a brisk, steady pace pass several brick buildings and a few newer ones made of who-knows-what. Two houses away Dan asks me "do you have the key?"

I stop to take the key out of my sweatshirt pocket. The back of the umbrella cuffs my head as Dan keeps walking. Dan notices I'm gone once I'm not touching his side anymore. He quickly turns around and I'm poked in the eye by the umbrella.

"Sorry!" Dan quickly backs up with the umbrella. I look at him through it and smile.

"It's okay." I say happily as I blink rapidly and rub my right eye. "No harm done really. I just-" I blink a few more times, "I'm fine now."

Dan shuffles back over without saying anything and puts the umbrella over my head.

I show him the key. "Got it."

"Now let's go before we either freeze, drown, or get seen."

"Probably best." I agree with a smile and we hurry down the street.

*~* - sick panda page breaker - *~*

"Nice hair." I comment as Dan settles into his sofa crease.

"You mean awful curly hobbit hair?"

I shrug. "I think it's cute."

He looks at me sideways. "Of course you would."

I give him a swift peck on the lips.

"Hmm." I comment as I pull away. "Your lips are cold. I'll make hot chocolate."

"It should rain more often if I get hot chocolate out if it."


	10. Post-It Notes

While reading The Amazing Book Is Not On Fire for the first time ever(I think because of my friends, I dunno)in seventh grade I found a pretty odd thing that has stuck with me: Dan eats the unpopped kernels of popcorn… WHY DAN, WHY!? ~gum wrapper.

I don't own Dan Howell or Phil Lester.

* * *

Post-It Notes

Phil's p.o.v.

I sit on my bed nestled up in a few thick blankets and with the heat on high and just about everything I could imagine that could keep me warm piled around me.

Except Dan. He left to visit a severely sick relative and has been gone for two days. He's coming back in a day he thinks but isn't sure. He might have to stay longer if they die.

I'm all alone watching various different videos and movies on my laptop. Nothing to do really besides this. It's so cold outside and inside I really would rather not do anything else anyway.

After about three movies I hear my stomach rumble. I wonder if getting up to feed myself is really worth the cold trip to the kitchen.

It is.

I climb out of my warm pile and do my best to hurry into the kitchen.

"Ow!" I cry rubbing my nose and forehead because I ran into the glass door again. I'm rather surprised Dan and I haven't broken it yet honestly with how often we run into it.

I open the door and look around the kitchen. I see a pink Post-It note on a cupboard door. I read it and see it's from Dan but that's not too surprising as he is the only other person who lives here. The note reads in tiny font:

I know it's going to be cold while it's gone and that when it's cold you like to watch movies and eat warm popcorn sooooooooo

*look in cupboard please ;)*

I open the cupboard door. A box of microwaved popcorn packets sits inside with another pink note. This one says in the same small font:

Just for you! And no worrying about me breaking a tooth on a kernel like you always stress out about! :D

Love you.

I smile and while popping a packet reread the notes and imagine Dan writing it just before he left.

I put the notes in my pocket as I carefully avoid the door of doom again. When I settle back into my cave of blankets, pillows, various other objects, and such I put Dan's notes on the side of my laptop so I can see them.

As I stare at them I wonder if he found the pink Post-It note I put in his coat pocket.


	11. Enjoying The Peace

Still don't own Dan and Phil.

* * *

Enjoying The Peace

Phil's p.o.v.

Dan's lying on the lounge floor which is new. What's even more new is that he is lying on his back with his eyes closed.

"Dan." I laugh looking at the mess on the floor. "You take up a lot of needed space!"

"Go around me carefully."

I roll my eyes. "Come on. You've had a half hour, get up."

"Phil, lie on the floor and stare at the inside of your eyelids." Dan says calmly.

"Why?"

"It's relaxing. I'm not having a crisis, simply enjoying peace."

I stare wide-eyed at the young man on the floor. Dan's… enjoying peace? What has happened to him?

"What have you done to my boyfriend?"

"Shut up and come lie next to me you spoon." He snaps opening one eye.

There's my Dan.

*~* *~* More panda page breakers *~* *~*

"Okay, step one, think of your favorite person or object."

I nod and immediately think of Dan.

"What are you think of?" He murmurs softly taking my hand.

"You." I say matching his tone.

He doesn't laugh or call me a name like I thought he might. Something is wrong with him.

"Picture my face. Start at my hair and then slowly look go down to my forehead, down the nose, the mouth, chin, eyes, picture everything, go over everything."

I see his perfect face clearly and pay deep attention to every detail in my memory.

"Once you finish, just lie here and drift from your first thought to your next. It gets so relaxing you kind of dream while still being awake."

I tap an uncertain rhythm onto his hand with my pointer finger.

"I'm fine Phil. Calm down." He says and I can hear a smirk. "You're doing that little tapping thing you do when you're nervous."

I laugh. "You're acting strange."

"I'm just focusing on my object. Very hard, and for a long time now. I'm rather relaxed."

"You do know we are lying on a dirty floor?" I ask still not sure he's really Dan.

"Immersion ruined." Dan scolds sitting up with laughter.

*~* *~* Even more panda page breakers *~* *~*

We lie on the floor for a long time. Simply holding hands and breathing in sync. I think I fall asleep but I'm not sure.

"Phil?"

"What?" I ask my mouth feels like it's full of cotton.

I don't get an answer. Instead Dan carefully touches his lips to mine. I kiss him back gently.


	12. I May Have

Hey, it's me. Here with yet another chapter. :) ~gum wrapper.

I don't own AmazingPhil or danisnotonfire.

* * *

I May Have

Dan's p.o.v

"DAN!" Phil shouts from his room in a panic.

"Uh, what?" I call cautiously.

"I lost Ti-SOMEthing important!"

I sigh. Phil's always losing things. "Did you check where you last remember it?"

Silence. It's unsettling.

"Is the door locked?" Phil calls.

Fully intrigued I decide to investigate. I find Phil looking in the bathroom for his missing object.

"What are we looking for?" I ask.

Phil looks at me with frantic eyes and he says "You'll know. When you see it.. You'll know."

"What's that supposed to mean?! I can't find something i don't know anything about!"

Phil's already out of the bathroom.

"Phil! What am I looking for!?" I ask. "Searching for 'you'll know it when you see it' isn't gonna work."

"Check your room!" He shouts from his own.

I frown wondering how something got in my room and for how long has it been in there?

I scan the room first but everything seems to be in place. Suddenly my door swings closed.

I turn around very slowly. Has Phil misplaced a poltergeist? How the hell did he get a poltergeist?

"Who are you?" A little girl asks. She has hair that matches my shade of brown, two big teal eyes that look as though hey might have some green mixed in, and skin that is about as pale at Phil's.

I stare at her in amazement. My mind is completely blank.

She takes a few steps closer. I back up automatically.

"Who are YOU!" I ask as my mind finally restarts. "How did you get in here?"

"Pill."

I blink. Is she offering me drugs? My mind keeps waking up and I realize she means Phil.

Oh! She's what Phil lost! Wait, Phil lost a tiny young girl? How? Why does he

have a little girl? How did he get a little girl?

"Uh, Phil?!" I call. "I think I found, uh, her."

Phil appears quickly. Opening the door with a look of shame on his face. "I can explain the child!"

"Pill!" The girl cries and runs over to grab his leg. Phil smiles at her and kind of musses her hair. She looks back at me questioningly. "Who him?" She asks.

"That's Dan." Phil says and looks at me. "Dan, this is Tilly."

I nod still wondering why Phil has a child in our flat and why he seems to know her. I mean, she's adorable and all, like, I want to hug her adorable, but why is she here?

"Oh, um, I may have adopted her."


	13. Finally Met You

A school-based one. Warning: some angst but don't worry, it ends with some fluff! :) And I know Phil's a little OOC but I needed him to change a bit. ~gum wrapper.

I own no one mentioned.

* * *

Finally Met You

Dan's p.o.v.

Soulmates are an interesting topic for me and my friends. Especially because I'm the only one who hasn't found theirs yet.

When we were born, we were born with a colored line running down our arms. As the line gets shorter, we run out of time to meet our soulmate. If you run out of line that means your soulmate has died. The line is your soulmates life span. If they die, you keep living but with no soulmate to look for.

When you meet your soulmate the line disappears and is replaced with bare skin. No one knows why; it just happens.

When I was born it was clear my soulmate was older than me as the line was already shorter. My soulmate does have a long life though. The line decreases slowly. Until one day, the line goes from just above the crook of my elbow to a quarter way done my forearm.

"Hey, Dan. Find 'em yet?" Louise asks me greeting me in class.

"No." I say sitting next to her. "But I have some bad news. Can you keep a secret?"

She nods. "Did they die?"

I pull up my sleeve (which I wore long to keep it covered on purpose) and show her. "Yesterday it was here." I say pointing. "What does it mean?"

She frowns. "Maybe they were in an accident or something?"

I pull my sleeve back down quickly. "I'm running out of time! It's even gone down more since this morning! I have to find them."

"Well, I met my soulmate and the lines disappeared when he talked to each other. You just have to talk to every person."

I sigh. "That won't work. I'm not very good in social scenarios. They would have to talk to me."

She thinks for a moment before whispering "see me at lunch."

At lunch.

I sit at my normal table. My friends gathered around me.

"Louise said it was important."

"Did you find your soulmate?"

"Here she comes!"

I turn as Louise places her lunch tray beside mine. She then stands on the chair and I jump up a second too late to stop her from yelling.

"DAN HOWELL DOESN'T KNOW HIS SOULMATE! COME TALK TO HIM TO SEE IF IT'S YOU BECAUSE HIS LINE IS RUNNING LOW!"

"LOUISE!" I shout. "YOU SAID YOU COULD KEEP A SECRET!"

She sits beside me as a line forms. I glare at her. The table snickers and then erupts with roars of laughter.

By the end of lunch I've spoken to so many different people I'm beginning to wonder how my friends found their soulmates so quickly.

Twenty minutes before school ends.

During last period I excuse myself to the bathroom as I get suddenly very light-headed.

As I near the bathroom something tells me to check the line. I do and my heart sinks.

It's almost at my wrist.

Suddenly I get the need to throw up. I hurry to the bathroom and then promptly vomit into a trashcan. I feel tears running down my face.

I'm too slow. I've lost them. My soulmate's dying.

I throw up again and then sink down to sit on the floor. My head spinning. I close my eyes but tears still drip down my face.

"Hey, what are you doing?"

I don't move. I remain tense and locked up. A hand touches mine. It's warm.

Suddenly, my wrist burns. I cry harder. My soulmate must be gone.

"Hey, hey, don't cry. It's going to be okay."

"No. It won't be. They've died." I correct whoever is leaning over me.

They don't answer for a while and then they whisper very quietly.

"What?" I ask.

"Let me see your line, Dan."

I look up. A boy with hair that's so dark it kind of appears blue is next to me.

"How do you know my name?"

"I was in the lunchroom when your friend shouted."

"Oh." I say feeling my face warm up.

He carefully pulls up his sleeve and I pull up mine.

It's gone. My line is gone.

I stare. When they died you get their name written. Why don't I have a name?

"Hey, mine's gone." He says.

It clicks.

"You're my soulmate." I say. Then I blurt "I thought you died."

He laughs a little. "Well, I was… Let's not discuss what I would have done if you weren't sitting here crying. We found each other just in time that's all that matters."

I nod. "Okay."

The boy looks me over with his grey-blue eyes. "I thought you'd be a bit less tear stained if I found you."

"Well, it's not my fault." I say hotly.

"Ooo, someone's a grumpy bear."

I frown. "For someone so unhappy, you are sure perky right now."

"I'm relieved and so happy I met you finally." He says.

I stand up as I realize what's happening fully. "I'm a mess! I'm a mess and this is how you meet me!"

"You look fine to me and I think my thoughts in how you look matter the most."

I feel my face burn. "Shut it."

He snickers a little.

I wet a paper towel and wipe tear tracks off my cheeks. My soulmate watches me closely.

"Come on bear, you look fine to me!" He teases as I fix my messy hair. "You're acting like a girl."

I stick my middle finger up at him in the mirror. "Shut it. I'm not a girl."

The school bell rings as he goes to say something back.

We look at each other and then he says "my name's Phil by the way."

Dan and Phil. It has a nice sound. I like it.


	14. Cookies For Papa

I don't own Phil Lester or Dan Howell.

I do kind of own Tilly though so back off. ;)

Also, if you are a bit squeamish because of blood, watch out. :)

* * *

Cookies for Papa 

"Come on." Phil whispers. "Watch out for the glass door, it hurts."

Tilly follows behind her father into the kitchen. Both trying not to wake the third person in the house.

"Why's it hurt?" She whispers

"When you run into it and smack your nose it's very painful."

"Oh. Okay!" Tilly smiles.

Phil sets his laptop on the counter and scrolls through a list of ingredients.

"I wanna see."

Phil scoops up the tiny girl and sets her on the counter. She rubs her nose against his in an eskimo kiss.

"Thank you Daddy." Tilly says sweetly.

"You very welcome. Now, we need to gather all the ingredients. Your job is to make sure we have them all okay?"

"Okay." She nods dutifully.

Phil collects several items and them puts them on the counter beside her. Tilly corals the ingredients and bowls with a wooden spoon.

"Okay, I think we have everything. You ready to make some cookies?"

"Yep!"

"Okay step one, preheat oven to 190 degrees(375 degrees F)and soften a cup of butter."

Tilly holds up a slightly mashed stick of butter. Phil takes it and Tilly watches as he melts it.

"Smells pretty."

Phil laughs. "I guess you could say it smells pretty."

Tilly holds up two fingers as the butter melts. "Sep two?"

"Yep. We need a large bowl to cream together butter and sugar in." Phil looks up at Tilly, "I don't know what it means to ccream something… you can just stir the bowl for a while."

"Yay! Stir!"

While Tilly ferently attempts to cream with her wooden spoon Phil cracks an egg and breaks it into her mixture. She laughs and he grins as he breaks another.

Phil grabs a small brown bottle and holds it under her nose. "Smell this, Til."

"Yucky."

"That's vanilla." He puts a teaspoon of the extract into her bowl much to her disgust and horror.

Tilly adjusts her position so she is now on her knees. She uses both of her tiny arms to stir the ingredients and her knees keep the bowl in place.

Phil watches until he declares the "creaming" process to be over.

"Now, in a separate bowl we mix together flour, oats, salt, baking powder, and baking soda." Phil tells his young daughter.

"Why?"

"Because the recipe calls for it."

"Why?"

"I don't know. To make it taste good."

Phil stirs this bowl and then Tilly holds her bowl as he pours the two together.

"What now?"

"We add two cups of chocolate chips and four ounces of grated chocolate… we don't have grated chocolate do we?"

Tilly scans her remaining items. "No Daddy."

"We can do it ourselves! Try new things Til."

Phil remembers yesterday's conversation with Dan as Tilly asks "why?"

"Phil she won't stop asking why I have to change my socks!"

"Did you tell her?"

"Yes! And now she wants to know why they're dirty."

"Then tell her."

There was a few seconds pause.

"Jesus Christ, Tilly! Socks get dirty because your feet are dirty! I don't know why your feet are dirty!"

Phil finds a cheese grater high up on a shelf in the back. Clearly, they haven't needed to use it in a while. "Try new things because then you'll be able to say you did something new and exciting."

"Why?"

"Okay, enough questions for now. Here, unwrap this chocolate."

"Why?"

"Because you need to stop asking why so I'm distracting you with chocolate."

"Yay!"

Tilly unwraps the chocolate quickly and Phil starts to rub it against the grater. As he finishes the first bar of chocolate his finger slips.

"Ow! Ow! Ow!" Phil winces as blood appears on his cut finger.  
"Oh no!"

"Tilly, I'm going to be right back. Don't fall off the counter." Phil says as he goes off towards the bathroom.

"Ow." He inspects the four lines going down his finger. They're deep.

Phil washes his finger and bandages it the best he can with his left hand. If he was Dan it wouldn't be as much of a problem.

"Daddy." Tilly's voice comes from the doorway.

"How did you get off the counter?"

"I jumped like froggy."

Phil chuckles as he pictures her flying off the counter. Her wavy hair bouncing around her face as she lands.

Tilly comes closer and takes the bandage from Phil. She sticks her tongue out the left side of her mouth as she concentrates.

She kisses his fingertip, fingernail, and where he cut himself before declaring him healed.

"Thanks Til. Where would I be without you?"

"Bleedin'."

Phil laughs. "Yes, I probably would be bleeding still."

The two quietly return to the kitchen. Tilly doles out cookies onto a pan while Phil starts to clean up their mess.

The oven beeps signaling it's time for the cookies to go in. Phil slides them in and sets a timer.

"Now we wait."

"How long?" Tilly asks making her pointer and middle fingers into a pair of legs that run over Phil's fingers. He tries to catch them between his.

"Six to eight minutes."

"How long before Papa is up?"

"Whenever he smells the cookies." Phil responds.

Tilly nods. "When's that?"

"Probably in six to eight minutes."

"How long's a minute?"

"Look, baby chocolate chips." Phil says lifting up a bowl counter.

"Yay! Baby chips!" Tilly cries forgetting her question.

Phil watches as she lines them up and eats them one by one and smiles happily.


	15. Hair Dye Part 2

Dan Howell and Phil Lester are their own persons so I don't own them.

* * *

Hair Dye… Part 2

Dan's p.o.v.

"What do you me-is it really that bad?"  
He stares at me for longer than I stare at him usually. I look just past his head at a light on the wall. I will not freak out.

"Why? How?" He asks unable to form a full sentence.

I wince. Is it really awful? And how long does hair dye stay in if it is permanent?

"I made a mistake."

He nods. Oh God he hates me! I made my boyfriend think I'm stupid and on top of it I have bright red hair he doesn't like! I'm an awful person, I'm an awful person….

"On a totally unrelated note… how long does permanent hair dye last?" I say trying to keep calm and sound casual.

His eyes get big and then he sighs. He takes his phone from his back pocket and starts typing.

"Do you cut your hair?"

"No? What kind of question is that?"

"Do you wash it?"  
"Every other day or so."

Phil scrolls down and after a while he starts laughing.

"What?"

He hands me the phone and I read out loud. "If you cut your hair it goes away a bit more, if you wash your hair it very slowly fades." My hope rises. "Alright. I'll just cut my hair a bit, wash my hair all the time, and we should be good in a few months right?"

I then notice the part in all caps.

IF YOU LET YOUR HAIR GROW OUT, GET IT CUT EVERY FEW MONTHS, WASH IT DAILY, IT SHOULD LAST ABOUT 2 YEARS! :D

I look at the smiley face in disgust.

And then it fully sinks in.

Two years.

I was thinking maybe I could go two or so months without a new video but… two years? No way. Not even half a year.

I groan. "Great."

Phil looks up at my hair and then pulls a bit of my fringe. "Maybe you could wear a hat?"

"For two years? All the time?"

"You're right… um, how about you just… keep it red?" His voices goes high at the end.

"I'm going to have too." I swear. "Two years!"

"Why did you dye your hair again?"

"I was bored."

His laughter follows me back into the lounge where I hide in Tumblr in embarrassment.

"I love you anyway." He calls.

"Love you too Phil."


	16. It Can't Wait

… _.Don't ask about that last chapter. I swear I'm not on drugs! I think I was just overly tired or something. HOPEFULLY, this chapter will make up for it! :) And Tilly probably isn't needed in this chapter but I wanted her to be mentioned because I love her. ;)_

 **I don't own AmazingPhil and/or danisnotonfire**

* * *

 _It Can't Wait_

 _Dan's p.o.v._

"Okay, Dan, you have everything ready. You have actually made a successful dinner for the first time ever, you know exactly when Phil is coming back home, you have everything under control."

Riiiiiiiing!

I grab my phone from my pocket and answer immediately knowing it's Phil.

"Hi." I say quickly.

"Hey… I'm going to be a hour late. I got held up in a meeting." His voice sounds extremely sorry so I don't blame him too much but still, are. You. Kidding. Me?

"O-oh. Okay." I bite my knuckles to keep from saying something I would regret.

"I'm sorry. I know you said you had something exciting to show me but there's nothing I can do."

"It's okay." I mumble channeling my inner Napstablook(you know, the little ghost thing from Undertale).

"I will be only an hour late though so it won't be too bad."

"Yeah."

"I love you Dan."

"I love you too." I say and he says sorry one more time before hanging up the phone.

I wait ten seconds before exploding. "GAH! I can't wait that long! I will literally _die_ if I have to wait two hours! Why did his meeting have to go long tonight? Who am I talking too!?"

I wait another ten seconds before rushing to put on shoes and a coat. I grab my keys and then leave the flat, locking the door behind me.

"Phil, where are you?" I ask as soon as he answers his phone.

"On the underground why?"

"Where are you going?"

"Same place as always? Home."

I nod. I can meet him on the way. "Thanks."

"Bye?"

"Bye."

I actually consider running to meet Phil but then laugh and keep walking. I make it there just as he is getting off the train.

"Phil!" I yell spotting his black fringe.

"Dan? What are you doing here?"

"I had to meet you. I couldn't wait." I say happily.

He laughs. "Your exciting thing must be really exciting."

"You could say that." I say slyly.

Phil looks at me for a few seconds and then says, "What is it?"

"Oh! Yeah!" I blink and then smile as a blush climbs up my neck and onto my face. "I love you Phil."

"I love you too?"

"And I was wondering if you would want to marry me?" I say bluntly. It's not how I wanted to say it but last second I panicked and just spat it out.

"Of course!" Phil cries as he hugs me. I grin. _He said yes!_

Phil kisses me his lips warm.

"That was why I couldn't wait for you to get home." I say awkwardly breaking our kiss.

Phil grins as he lets me go. "I wouldn't have been able to wait either."

We start to walk back home. I hold Phil's hand and his fingers tap a happy and fast beat out onto my hand.

"Hey, what did you do with Tilly in order to get here so fast?" Phil asks.

My heart stops.

We have a kid. Oh yeah… I was watching her… and she was in bed when I left… Shit.


	17. Homework

_Thankfully, I've been able to access your reviews through my email and I read two or three that liked Tilly. YAY! So, here is a rather fluffy chapter with an older Tilly. ~gum wrapper._

 **I don't own AmazingPhil or danisnotonfire.**

* * *

 _Homework_

 _Dan's p.o.v._

"Papa, where's Daddy?" Tilly asks pressing her nose to the back of my laptop.

"He's doing a YouNow."

She frowns. "Then can you help me?"

"With what?"

"Homework."

 _I rarely did homework when I went to school! How am I supposed to help her?_

 _Wait, she's only in fourth grade, it can't be that hard._

"What do you need help with?" I ask setting my laptop down beside me.

"Division."

"You do that in fourth grade?"

"Yep!" She says ever a cheery person.

I sigh and she leads me over to the table where she climbs into the red chair and sits on her knees. I sit beside her and look at the worksheet she has. She has doodles going down both margins.

"Okay, I know this." I say half-confident.

So I start to explain to her how to divide and then she stops me.

"You're doing it wrong! You have to put the decimal here if you can't make it work!"

"No you don't!"

"Yes you do! Look, I'll show you."

She rewrites the problem and starts it. By the time she's finished I'm way more confused.

"How do you do that?" I ask dumbfounded.

"What grade did you drop out in?" She responds.

"Haha very funny." I say poking her in the ribs. "Just absolutely hilarious."

She smiles sweetly.

"Show me again." I say. "I'll get it this time."

Tilly begins again. This time taking more time and putting in more detail.

I still don't get it.

"Why did you put a zero there?"

"You put a zero there if you have a decimal to-"

"Never mind, I just won't get it. Okay, you got the answer, next problem."

She writes the answer and then goes down. "35 divided by 4 is?"

"Why are you doing problems with decimals!? This isn't homework, this is torture!"

"I'm in a higher math class. It's easy but sometimes I get stuck."

I watch her keep going. Finally the zero and decimal point thing confuses me way too much.

"I can't help you." I sigh.

"I know. Why do you think I asked where Daddy was?"


	18. Name Calling

_I don't know why but I like having Dan and Tilly have disagreements. Probably because she's a combination of both of them so she is just as fiery and sassy as Dan. Anywho, here you go._

 **I don't own AmazingPhil or danisnotonfire.**

* * *

 _Name Calling_

 _Tillyś p.o.v._

"Fourth grader."

I growl. "YouTuber."

"Shorty."

"Tree." I counter easily.

"Messy hair."

"Lame hair." I fire back.

He leans forward across the table. Daddy watches us cautiously.

"Twat."

"Dan!"

"Bigger twat."

"That doesn't even make sense." Papa narrows his eyes.

"You don't make sense."

I push father. "Meme queen, scaredy cat; I mean really, who screams at Five Nights at Freddy's one?"

Papa scowls after his cheeks return to normal color. "You are too active on the internet."

"Say someone who's job is on the internet."

He falters. "Teal eyes."

I grin. He's given me a great advantage. "Heart-eyes Howell."

Daddy laughs but tries to hide it.

"That's it. You win." Papa leans back in his chair and throws his arms over his head. "Get off the internet! Oh my god! Fluffing kid knows everything about me. I can't do anything."

I pull up YouTube on my phone and quickly find my all time favorite video of his. Hello Internet.

"What are you doing?" Papa asks. "You're smirking."

I lean over to show Daddy. He laughs and doesn't bother to hide it.

"Hi. My name is [Dan]."

"NO! NO! STOP!"

"Why should I?" I tease.

He looks at Daddy then me. "Fine. Fine. You win. You get the cookie."

"Yes!" I smile happily as I take it. "Thank you Papa."

"Fluff off."

"Dan, she's eight."

I smile as sweetly as possible. "Yeah, I'm only eight. No bad words."

"Yeah, act sweet now. You act sweet now you motherf-"

"DAN!"


	19. Replacement

_OH MY! WE'RE HALFWAY TO FORTY! Some weird guys were stalking our school concert while I was home safely writing for you guys so uh… thanks? Also, I've been receiving a bunch of requests for more Tilly so she's being more frequent in stories. If this bothers anyone please let me know. =D ~gum wrapper._

* * *

 _Replacement_

 _Phil's p.o.v._

"Dan, be honest," I say leaning over so my head's on his black shirt. "If I died, would you try to replace me with someone else?"

Dan suddenly gets very tense and doesn't say anything for a long time. I hear his heartbeat get faster like I've just jumped out at him in a haunted house.

"No" When he speaks it's very soft and his voice is shaking. "No I wouldn't be able to. You're irreplaceable."

I simply nod with my head still on his shoulder. "Okay."

Ever since I asked Dan if he would try to replace me he's gone really quiet. I think I scared him.

"Dan, what's wrong?"

"You, me," He sighs and then looks up at me. It's too quick though. He looks up at ceiling and closes his eyes. "If you died, I wouldn't try to replace you because it wouldn't be possible. You are one of a kind and very, very special to me. You are one of my first friends, my best friend, my boyfriend, my everything really. Without you the world would be a little bleaker. The fans call you the sun for a reason Phil."

I stare at him. Dan sometimes can go really deep but that was intense. "Wow. You… wow."

"What?" He asks with a faint smile flashing over his handsome features.

"You are amazing you know that? I can only say mush when I try to explain something like that."

He smiles for real this time and I admire his dimples and how they make him look a bit more alive and not static.

"I know you love me anyway though." He mumbles. "You don't have to say it."

"Good because I do love you." I say and kiss him.


	20. Tilly

**Still don't own Dan and Phil.**

* * *

 _Tilly_

 _Dan's p.o.v._

A door slams and then I hear someone running up the stairs. I count the seconds it takes for them to reach the door.

Twelve and a half.

Louder footsteps that sound much heavier follow. They aren't running. I count those ones too.

Twenty-three exactly. Phil just missed doubling Tilly's time.

"We have an idea!" Phil announces. "It's great and you'll love it."

I don't look up from my laptop. "What is it?"

Don't think I'm being lazy or that I don't care, I do but it's just that last week they tried to go to the zoo and one of them was almost eaten by a bird. Just a _normal_ bird. They hadn't even made it there yet.

And to be honest after that I'm surprised Tilly thought it was a good idea to go outside again. I mean, she's probably smarter than both of us and yet after the bird attack she still went outside.

"Lemons." Tilly says.

"What?" I ask sitting up a bit more.

"She means lemonade." Phil explains.

I can already see where this is going. "No."

They both scowl at me. "Why not?" They say together.

"The bird incident, the puddle incident, the crowd incident, should I go on? You two will start a fire out of plain lemons."

They try again. "Please? Just for an hour?"

Phil looks at me with part of his fringe falling over one eye. I look away. I will not say yes just because he looks so good right now.

Tilly climbs up onto the couch with me. Her muddy pants, tangled hair, and scrunched up nose make her look as adorable as ever and then says "yes lemons or else."

"Or else what?" I counter poking under her chin. She squeals and falls backwards off the couch and lands on her back.

"Help." She begs as I continue to tickle her and Phil pulls her up.

"See, you can't even sit on the couch." I say and pretend to frown in disdain.

"No fair! You tickled me!" She climbs back up and gets as close to me as possible. "Please? You can have some for free."

"Fine but only because you're not going to let me say no." I say scooping her up into my arms as I stand.

Phil and Tilly let out symmetrical whoops of joy.

They make the lemonade and I decide to help them out. I tweet, post, comment, everything I can. All I write though is: _Anyone who's brave enough to come find Phil, me, (and an extra), look out for a lemonade stand._ This is the closest me or Phil have ever gotten to telling our fans about Tilly and if they find us, they'll know but I don't mind.

 **About an hour later.**

A woman buys a styrofoam cup of lemonade. Phil helps Tilly with the money. I watch from out the window because… I don't know why. I didn't want to be involved with the start of the zombie apocalypse?

I eventually wander down.

"Here!" Tilly says giving me a cup. I take a sip carefully.

"Oh God!" I say making a face. "Did you two just use straight up lemons?"

"Yep." Tilly nods.

"Why?! You have to add sugar! It's extremely sour! Didn't you taste it?"

They both look at the ground. "No."

"We'll fix it. I'll help you this time." I say.

"Don't eat that." I warn.

"Why not?" She asks taking a spoon out of her mouth.

I look at her to see if she's being serious. She is.

"Tilly, that's a spoon."

"But I'm hungry and spoons have food on them."

"Okay, come here Tilly," I call her over.

"Look, I've got everything we need, all you have to do is put the things together. Can you do that?"

Tilly stands on her toes to see over the edge of the the counter. It's so cute it's practically heart-crushing. "I can't see Papa."

I pick her up and put her on my shoulders. "How about now?"

"I'm too tall." She laughs. Her fingers play with my hair.

I sit her on the counter. "You need to grow."

"I'm trying! I'm trying to grow Papa!"

I smile and kiss her forehead. How can someone be so damn adorable?

I took the easy route for Tilly simply found some powder that only needs to be mixed with water so she pours the powder into a pitcher while I fill up a glass with water.

"Here, pour this in."

Tilly goes to but then stops and smirks.

"What-" She throws the water onto me.

I get another glass full and then dump it on her. She screams and laughs. I go to get more water and she sails off the counter and lands on the floor. Tilly rushes to the sink but I beat her.

"No! I need water!"

I laugh. "Never!"

"Nooo!" She wails through her laughter. I pour water on her head.

I hold her with one arm as I refill my cup.

"Lemme go!" She flails around trying to get free.

As I go to pour more water on her Phil comes into the kitchen. "What are you doing?!"

"We're throwing water at each other."

Phil looks around at the mess we've made.

"I thought you were making lemonade!"

"Keyword there, _were._ " I say. Tilly nods.

Phil eyes me and Tilly. "Hey, Dan, she's gonna-"

Tilly shoves my arm up and water splashes into my face. I let her go and wipe my face.

"That's it! You have ten seconds to hide before I soak you fully clothed in the shower!" I threaten.

Tilly scrambles past Phil and disappears.

"Who's going to burn down the flat?" Phil teases as I slip in a puddle.

I grab onto his arm to keep from falling. "We'll clean it up after I find her and drench her in cold water."  
He laughs. "Just make sure she isn't going to get sick or something."

"Yep." I nod and kiss him distractedly.

Phil pulls back from the kiss slowly. "Go find her. I'll clean up the puddles."

I race off. "Tilly! I'm coming to get you!"

I hear laughter but it's muffled.

"Tilly, come out of your hiding spot and I won't soak you."

I make my way through her (my old) room and through me and Phil's room. I search the whole house. She's no where.

"Tilly!"

Phil finds me. "Are you still looking?"

"Yes." I say a bit worriedly.

"I'll help. Where have you already looked?"

"Everywhere."

"Tilly! I promise I won't soak you! I'm not joking!" I try.

"Tilly!" Phil echoes.

We search again and again.

I start to become over run with panic. What if she's scared of me? I couldn't live with it if she was scared of me. I love her too much.

Finally I end up back in her room. I lie on the bed and think of any places a very tiny child could hide.

"Papa?" Tilly pokes her head out from the pillows. She was lying under the pillows?!

"Tilly!" I hug her with so much force she starts coughing.

"Sorry."

"It's okay." She mumbles.

I notice her hair has dried a bit and it's curled like mine does. I grin and Tilly lays her head on my heart and I listen to her quite tiny breathing as I tease her soft hair.

Phil finds us and sits down beside me. "You found her."

"Hiding in the pillows." I mumble.

"Is she asleep?"

" I think so."

"Love you Dan." Phil whispers. He leans back until he's laying down. His black hair is off to the side so I can see both of his closed eyelids.

In the darkness of the room I hear three different sets of breathing. One's tiny but deep, one's deeper and they breath in longer, and one's simply normal.

I find Phil's hand and hold it lightly. I like the thought of right now having contact with the two most important things to me.

"I love you too, Phil." I whisper back long after he said it. I move my head very slowly to look at Tilly's sleeping face. "I love you both."


	21. You Matter More To Me

I personally don't favor this song but it gave me inspiration. Also, I think I need a sadder one before I post my next one which is rather overloading with fluff. :) ~gum wrapper.

I DO NOT OWN DANISNOTONFIRE, AMAZINGPHIL, OR THE SONG BY SHAWN MENDES (also the lyrics are spread out so it's not in perfect song format).

* * *

You Matter More To Me

Dan's p.o.v.

Phil's on a date with his stupid boyfriend. The stupid one who I know isn't nice to Phil. I've seen him hit Phil. Many times. But Phil's told me not to do anything about it and I can't handle that. I've never been able to and never will be. Phil's being harmed and he's too scared to do anything.

So I've decided to tell Phil. To tell him I love him, that he can't go on like this, that he matter's more to me than anyone else.

At the same time I'm too scared so I wrote a note. I put it on his bedroom door. It reads:

I won't lie to you. I know he's just not right for you. And you can tell me if I'm off but I see it on your face when you say he's the one that you want. And you're spending all your time in this wrong situation and any time you want it to stop I know that I can treat you better than he can. Any guy like you deserves a gentleman (or as close to one as I can get). I can practically see you ignoring my shouts about how I could help you and how you needs to leave that sorry bastard. "I'm fine Dan. It's nothing too bad." You say. "Just a few bruises." A few bruises still means you're being hurt. Why can't you see that Phil? You should be with me instead. I know that I can treat you better. Better than he can Phil.

With real, true, love,

Dan.

I notice that he comes home alone. I also notice he takes the note off the door. I can hear the tape being pulled from the paint.

"Dan," Phil says just as I'm starting to wonder if he read the note or just took it down.

I jump up from my bed. "Phil."

"Dan why did you put this on my door?" He sounds more curious than sad, angry, or disappointed.

"Phil, I really do love you. More than him. More than anyone can." I say. "I know that I can treat you better than he can and any guy like you deserves a gentleman."

I think he blushes a little but he looks at the floor. "You aren't exactly a gentleman."

"I'm not a jerk either." I counter.

Phil nods. His pretty blue eyes trying to dig up any lies in mine. But I'm a bad liar. He would know if I was lying.

He takes the few steps it takes and closes the gap between us. I find his lips with mine almost excitedly.

"Take my hand, we'll be fine." I say kissing Phil's cheek.

He looks at me uncertainly but slips his hand into mine. The fact that it fits nicely is something I enjoy.

"Promise I won't let you down."

"He'll hit you." Phil warns.

"I'll hit him harder." I say even though I've never been in a fight with anyone.

Phil laughs. "You couldn't hurt him. I don't think you could break styrofoam if you punched it."

"You need to have confidence." I say jokingly. "You try, and if it doesn't work I'll step up."

"I know."

"Just know that you don't have to do this alone. I'll be right here."

He looks at me like he's still wanting to run away. "Promise?"

"I'll never let you down."

The small grin that appears on his beautiful face is what I live for.


	22. Ink

_Here is another chapter for you. :)_

 **I don't own Dan and Phil.**

* * *

 _Ink_

 _Phil's p.o.v._

"Why do you have blue ink on your hand?" My teacher asks giving me a glare.

I look at my right hand. "There's no ink." I say confused.

"Your left." The girl sitting next to me says. "Look."

From my pinkie down to my wrist blue ink is smudged but it looks like a tattoo, like it's _in_ my skin. I can't rub it off either.

"Oh." My teacher says upon closer inspection. "Your soulmate is left handed."

I scowl. I don't want blue smudges all over my left hand. Why are they left handed and writing in ink?

The girl laughs. "Could be worse. Mine draws all over their arms."

To be polite I nod but then quickly take my erasable pen and write on the back of my left hand.

 **Stop writing in ink, it's all over my hand too!**

Unsurprisingly, I don't get a response. Until study hall that is.

I glance at my hand to see if there is still a blue ink smudge. There is but it's fading. As if my soulmate is hurrying to wash it off. I wonder where they are and why so much ink was on my, er, _their_ hand.

I keep working on my book report and then notice my other hand has writing. It reads:  
Sorry. Left handedism is a curse.

I erase my left hand and write **No kidding.**

Immediately on my wrist another message starts to be written. It's in pencil though so it's harder to read.

Smart move writing in erasable ink. I'll just have to fill up your whole arm. ;)

I groan. **No! Keep writing in pencil!**

Hey, my name's

I frown. Why'd they stop?

Won't let me write it? Hmm… fourth letter of the alphabet.

 **A, B, C, D… Okay.**

There's a long pause. I keep writing my report.

A

 **A what?**

That's the second letter you spoon.

 **Oh! Da... Dan?**

Yes!

I smile. Their name's Dan and they write left handed. I know that much.

Your name is?

 **16, 8, 9, 12**

There. That's my name in numbers. They can figure that out right?

Phil?

I sigh in relief. I know they aren't stupid.

 **Yes.**

There's another long pause. A _two day_ long pause.

"Philip! You can't write your notes on your arm!"

I look at my right arm because Dan's left handed. Sure enough a list of notes is going up my arm. Letters keep popping up as I read down the list.

"It's my soulmate. They apparently don't have paper."

She frowns. "Well, tell them to stop. You're taking a test!"

I nod and uncap my erasable pen. **I'm taking a test on the very stuff you're writing on my arm! Stop it!** I write on my left arm.

Sorry.

I finish the test quickly. "Sorry." I mumble as I pass it in.

"It's not your fault." She says with a swift look at my arm.

I go back to my seat quickly. _Last period can come any slower can it?_ I think. _I want to talk to Dan but she'll kill me._

The bell rings after ten more torturous minutes.

 **Hi. I have another study hall. What are you in?**

I look around at the students near me. If any of them notice me writing to my soulmate they don´t say anything. A kid with brown hair in a style opposite mine looks around and we make a short second of eye contact.

I'm in study hall too. What room are you in?

 **The library.**

It's not possible we're in the same room right now is it? Are we? Can I find Dan?

I have an idea.

I wait but get no more information. The bell rings and I move to lunch. People stare at me as I pass. I decided to take a trip to the bathroom mirror to see what's wrong.

"No! No! Dan how could you!" I stare in horror at my reflection. My forehead says very clearly, Property of Mr. Howell. In washable marker. _At least we know he's allowed to write his last name_. I think sarcastically.

I immediately take out my pen and go to write on my hand. I read the note on my other hand first.

Sorry, but I'm gonna find you. My friends wrote it on for me so you should thank them ;)

 **Listen, I'm too embarrassed to leave the bathroom so your plan failed. Wash the marker off now!**

I do my best to cover up the words with my fringe but it doesn't work completely. I stare into the mirror and sigh.

What school do you go to?

 **Smart time to ask huh?** I ask annoyed.

"Whatever, just answer the question." A voice says from outside the stall I've hidden myself in. "Yeah I should have asked before but it's too late now."

I hear water running and use my phone as a mirror. I watch the letter's slowly disappear.

"There. It's all gone now you twat."

I get the sneaking suspicion I should look at my arm. Sure enough the words I've gotten rid of them appear.

 **Hey, are you in the second floor bathroom right now? Did you just refer to me as a twat?** I write down my arm.

Maybe… Why?

It's a bold move but I unlock the stall and the brown haired boy from study hall turns around to face me.


	23. Some Explaining To Do

This one is about a certain comment Dan made in the 33rd Sims video… HE'D SELL HIS CHILD FOR THE RIGHT PRICE… of course, Tilly has something to say about that. ;) (I wasn't going to post it because it isn't the fluffiest but peer pressure…) ~gum wrapper.

* * *

Some 'Plaining to do. 

Dan's p.o.v.

"Would you sell your own child?" Phil blurted as I sold the bass in Sims.

"Yes. For the right price." I say half-jokingly.

I had thought nothing of it. Even when editing the video later. I just went ahead with it and it wasn't until Tilly suddenly shouted my name, my actual name not Papa, that I think about it again.

"DANIEL JAMES HOWELL!" Tilly spins around from the table. She takes out her earbuds.

Uh oh.

"YOU WOULD SELL YOUR OWN CHILD!?" Tilly shouts.

Phil leans forward on the couch. "For the right price too."

"Whose side are you on?" I ask him angrily.

"Hers."

Tilly snickers. "How much would I go for eh?"

I can't tell if she's joking. She is right? I stare at her. What the hell am I supposed to say?

"Uhhmm…. A few hundred pounds?"

And then Tilly, the strongest, fiercest, little girl I know, starts to cry. I get sick to my stomach. I made her cry. Oh God, I made her cry!

"Tilly! Tilly, I was joking!" I call but she runs away from me. Phil stares at where she was standing in shock. I jump up and follow her.

"Tilly!" I slam into her bedroom door. "Til, please, open the door. I want to talk to you. I was joking."

"That's how much would you sell me for!?" She cries.

"Tilly," I change to a softer tone. "I promise it was just a joke. I wouldn't sell you no matter the price."

"Shut up."

"Til, come on, open the door." I beg. The sinking sensation in my gut worsens. What have I done?

"NO!" Tilly screams. "You don't like me!"

I slump against the door. I really messed up. I fluffed up so bad I don't think I can forgive myself. "Tilly please?"

Phil sits beside me. "Dan, I don't think it'll do either of you any good to talk to each other right now."

"Tilly, please, open the door!" I plead. "Please, please, please open the door."

"GO AWAY! I'm never opening this door for you!" Her voice cracks and it hurts me to hear her so upset.

I rest my head on his shoulder. "Phil, what am I going to do? I screwed up."

He kisses my hair and forehead. "It'll be alright. She'll see it was a joke."

"You are the worst person ever Dan Howell! I hate you! I hate you!" Tilly chokes on her words and I hear her sob.

I wince and close my eyes. I'm the worst person ever in her eyes and that hurts so much I can't explain it.

"No Phil, she'll hate me forever." I mumble and then I feel my own tears coming down.

Tilly's p.o.v.

"She'll hate me forever."

I tuck my head into my knees. "I'm sorry." I whisper.

I can't open the door. Something is preventing me from reaching up and turning the handle. I think it's my feeling of betrayal. My first parents didn't want me and now Papa doesn't want me either? What did I do to make me so bad? I sob again.

"That's how much would you sell me for?" I ask again. I will ask until he gives me the answer I want.

"Tilly, he's not out here anymore. It's just me." Daddy's words sting a little. He left me. Everybody leaves me and they never come back.

I open the door now. I crawl onto Daddy's lap and cry hard into his shoulder.

"Tilly it's going to be okay." He rubs my back gently.

"No, no, I yelled at him! And now, now, now…" I cry into his shoulder harder.

"Hey, hey, Tilly it'll be okay. He'll forgive you and you'll forgive him."

I shake my head. My eyes are closed tightly and I'm afraid to open them. I'm scared to see if Papa really isn't there.

"I didn't mean it." I mumble after what seems like hours of endless crying. "I didn't mean that he was the worst person ever."

Dan's p.o.v.

"Papa," Tilly whispers squeezing my hand with her tiny little one. "Papa I'll love you forever. Even is the world explodes and we all die."

Why couldn't she stay five? She was so… innocent, sweet, and perfect. Not to mention she had the strangest yet greatest way of looking at the world.

"Dan?" Phil says. His voice is very soft. "She wants to talk to you."

I stand up from my dejected position on the bed and get a minor head-rush. "Really?"

Tilly lies against the door. Her fists are curled up tightly, her face is tear-streaked, her brown hair is messy, and her whole form is shaking with sobs.

"Tilly, I say sitting beside her. "Stop crying. It's okay."

She shakes her head. "No-o-o! I was mean to you and, and," Tilly starts to cry again.

"Hey, shh, shh," I pull her onto my lap and my fingers automatically smooth out her soft curls. "Tilly I'm sorry." I whisper. "I'm sorry I said I'd sell you."

She sits up a little. Her forehead presses against my chest and she breathes in these ragged, rough, dragging, shallow breaths.

"Tilly I love you." I murmur. "I could never sell you. You are worth far too much. I don't think you understand how much I love you."

Tilly sniffles. "I, I, I kno-o-ow you lo-o-ove me."

I smirk a little. "Breathe, Til."

"I'm so-o-orry. I yelled at yo-o-ou."

"It's okay, it's okay." I say. "I shouldn't have said what I did."

Tilly's slowly calms down and I hold her for a long time. We sit for so long, and so silently, Phil comes to make sure we hadn't killed each other.

"Did… did you fix it?" He asks so carefully it's like he might be walking above glass suspended by only a thin rope about to break.

I nod a little. "I think so."

Tilly takes a deep breath. "Yeah."


	24. Love Whoever

So, I got a prompt from the fabulous SuperFangirl21 (after a long discussion of who would write it)! YAY! It's great and I am super excited to present it so… HERE!

Yeah, I only own Tilly and I co-own her so… I basically own nothing written here. Not the characters, not the plot, nothing. 

***Also, there's gonna be some homophobic slurs.***

* * *

Love Whoever.

Tilly's p.o.v.

"My mum says gays are stupid and they should burn in hell."

The back of my neck tingles. I bite down hard on the inside of my mouth.

"She says it's unnatural, freaky, and people who are straight are normal and real humans."

I do my very best not to react. I can just sit here and stare at the desk while he keeps talking about how- I spin around and growl. "People have a choice to love whoever they want. If someone wants to marry someone who has the same gender as them why can't they?"

Sage's eyes get big. His friends back away.

"Answer me that! Why can't they?!" I yell.

I think he's confused because I'm yelling at him.

"It's not normal. Girls are supposed to like guys, and guys are supposed to like-"

I jump on him without thinking about it. His head bangs on the classroom floor tiles. I hope it hurts.

I hold my fingers around his throat but I'm not truly aware that I'm trying to strangle Sage. "Do you want to finish that sentence?"

"Why do you care?" He snarls and attempts to hit me but I hold his arms down with my legs. I'm a little happy to know I'm stronger than him.

"Because I do. Now are you going to finish the sentence?"

"Guys are supposed to like girls."

I punch him in the jaw, in the nose, all over his stupid face. His friends just watch. I keep pinning his arms down.

"Get off me!" He spits blood as he yells.

"NO!" I say as I continue to beat him.

"HEY! TILLY LESTER GET OFF HIM!" A teacher yells.

Sage finally gets his arms up and starts to hit me back. I hit and kick him harder. Screaming at him that he's wrong and dumb.

I don't know what happens after that but teachers have to pull me off him and scream at me to stop. They have have to stop him from collapsing.

I did that. I hurt him. I didn't really want to. I never want to hurt anybody.

But I had too. He was hurting Daddy and Papa.

The last two people I want to see right now walk into the office and I'm trapped here with a bruise forming on my left arm and my ankle throbbing. I scowl at Sage who sits across the room with a busted nose and an arm in a cast from across the table.

"Tilly, did you do that?" Papa asks in wonder.

"Yes." I say simply and then look down at the floor to hide my face from them. "I broke a few of his bones."

They can only look at me. I've never hurt anybody before and barely even got in trouble. I feel my stomach twist around itself and I feel a little empty.  
"I'm sor-" I go to start but they look up as the door opens.

"Miss Lester, now could you come explain to me what happened?" The principle asks. "I've just heard his side."

I follow her into the office. The principle adjust her royal purple suit, fixes her long wavy strawberry blonde hair, and looks at me almost approvingly with her green eyes.

"Okay, when did this happen?" Her voice is like honey. Sweet and thick. She has a slightly French accent.

"This morning. In science." I say clearly even though my conscience is wanting to make me mumble.

"Why?" The principle asks but she sounds like she already knows.

"He was being a bully."

"To you?"

"Not me specifically." I say well aware of the actually victims behind me.

She raises an eyebrow. "Who then?"

I sink into myself. I mumbles something but luckily nobody hears. I'm not ready to say it loud enough.

"Was it about your fathers Tilly?"

I nod slowly and after a log pause. I can feel both of them looking at me and I look down at the ground.

I want to look at them for just as second but keep my back to them as I continue. "He said… he said… gay people aren't humans, and that, that," I curls my fingers into a fist. "I wanted to shut him up. I needed to shut him up."

"He said more?"

"Yes." My voice is like a block of solid ice. "He said a lot more."

"Tilly, breathe please. You're getting very upset."

But I can't breathe or calm down. A lot of thoughts are running through my head. Ones I should say, ones I can't say, and then a few that hurt and bring tears to my eyes. I roll me eyes up to hide the tears.

"My real parents, they didn't want me and they were straight. They want me and they are my family," I point a shaky finger over my shoulder. "He doesn't get to say they aren't normal, that they're not real humans, that they are freaky, he doesn't get to say that about the only people who love me." I say in slow, measured sentences that come out with a lot of emotion.

The room is quiet. For a very long time. In a thick silence. So thick you could almost hold it. I resist the urge to shuffle my feet or make a sound to break it.

The principle slowly smiles. "You are a very smart girl."

"Thank you?" I say awkwardly.

"You know better than to start a fight."

"I do." I nod. My brown curls jump around my shoulders. "I'm sorry."

"It's not me you have to apologize too."

My stomach fills with lead.

Sage is brought in with his mother. He spits and flips his middle finger up at me. Daddy and Papa grab onto my arms as I jump forward.

"Sage, that is unacceptable." The principle says.

She keeps talking as Papa whispers in my ear: "he's not worth it Til. Ignore him."

Daddy nods. "You don't need to get in anymore trouble."

I recompose myself and then the principle turns her attention back to me.

"Were you trying to kill him? His mother says that was your intent."

I laugh. "No."

"We will have to suspend you for a week. If you had no motive we would have to expel you but your motive..." The sentence is left hanging. "One week starting Monday."

I look down and mumble not one or two, but a string of Dan's vast selection of swears.

"Sage will also be suspended for a week. For offensive and inappropriate language."

I looks up again but doesn't say anything.

Sage scowls. "I did nothing wrong! She's just crazy and dumb because she has-"

The principle cuts him off. "If you care to continue it can be two weeks." Her tone is severe.

Sage's mother quickly shushes her child. Something she should have done a very long time ago.

After we apologized to each other (and I stopped punching everything in sight once we got home) I'm sat down across from the YouTube duo Dan and Phil at the table.

"I'm sorry I got expelled, hurt someone (even if his sorry ass deserved it), made you come to school, and tried to hurt that fluffing kid again." I say in one long breath.

"Calm down." Daddy says. "And stop swearing Tilly."

"He does it." I nod my head towards Dan.

"I'm a terrible role model. Never copy me." Papa says.

Daddy nods and I bite my lip so I don't laugh. "And we really aren't mad at you Til. You shouldn't get expelled or beat people up, but you did it because you knew what he was saying was wrong and you stood up to him…. In a slightly bad way."  
I look between the two of them for a while. They're joking right?

"You aren't mad? At all? I beat the hell out of another kid! I broke his fluffing face! You aren't gonna do anything about that?"

"Tilly!" Daddy says. "Stop swearing please."

Dan laughs. "Would you like us to?"

"No? I guess not." I admit.

Papa smiles. "You aren't in trouble for standing up for us."


	25. My Letter To You

_Happy birthday to one of my friends! :) ~gum wrapper._

 **I don't own the song, the people, the anything (but you already knew that).**

 _(This one is based off a song, but the words not perfectly in the fic, I changed them in the sense they aren't in lyric form anymore.)_

* * *

 _My Letter To You_

 _Dan's p.o.v._

I wake up to kiss you and nobody's there. It's a full ten seconds before I remember properly that you left.

Yesterday I thought I saw your shadow by my door and got so excited. Like a child getting the best gift ever. When I realized you weren't there my smile melted and I closed my door so I wouldn't see anything else.

It's funny how things seemingly never change. How somehow I keep finding socks randomly placed here and there, how my cereal always seems to have less than I remember.

What I wouldn't do to find you eating my cereal is a very small list of things Phil.

"Dan?" You shout as you open the front door.

"Phil! You're back!" I exclaim. "It was forever!"

"It was only two weeks." You laugh.

I shrug as I meet you in the hallway. "It was a long time for me. I think I honestly started going insane."

"You're already insane."

"Shut up." I joke and you kiss my head as I hug you tightly.

"Come on, it's just one dance."

"I don't know how to dance Phil." I say stubbornly.

"You don't have to know. You just have to dance." You say. Your hair falling in front of your eyes. You flick your head to move it.

"That doesn't even make sense." I say trying to hide my smile.

You take my hand anyway and spin me around the lounge. I wince as I kick a chair and you laugh at me before starting to teach me how to properly dance.

"You put one foot here, yes, that's it,"

"Why are we doing this?" I ask.

"Because I want to dance with you." You state. "Okay, take a step left…"

I decide that even if the whole world was watching I'd still dance with you. You smiling every time I follow the pattern correctly, your hand holding mine tightly and never loosening it's grip or letting go in the slightest, it all is amazing and wouldn't care if everyone knew about us, if we got the chance, I'd dance with you every time.

I'd drive highways and byways to be there with you if you got sick like that time I had to have surgery and you were there. You drove almost an hour to be with me. All of my sick days, good days, existential crisis days, everything, everyone day comes back to you Phil.

"You've always be there for me." I say.

"I'd like to think you've been there for me too." You joke.

"Shut up you spork."

"And I want to tell you everything. The words I never got to say the first time around. I remember everything we've ever done together, all the things off camera I keep in my permanent memory."

"Dan, I've only forgotten some things, not everything we've ever done. It was just a bad fall not a car crash." You tease.

I feel myself blush. "Can I tell them anyways?"

"Pick your favorite things to remember."

I frown. "You're in all of them so they're all my favorites."

You still make me nervous when you walk in the room. Sometimes I think I still am 18 and have a huge crush on you but you don't know it. Like, sometimes my butterflies come alive when I'm next to you because I'm standing next to _Phil freaking Lester_! AmazingPhil is making a video with me or in _our_ kitchen. Sometimes I have to pull away from your kiss because I realize I'm _kissing_ AmazingPhil and it blows my mind that you would kiss me. I'm nobody special but you…. You are truly amazing, Phil.


	26. Goodnight Messages

_Go check out the fic_ Technicolor _by Phananddragons. It's amazingly written and I'm literally in love with with it. ~gum wrapper._

 **I don't own AmazingPhil and/or danisnotonfire.**

* * *

 _Goodnight Messages_

 _No p.o.v. really_

Phil: Why are you still awake?

Dan: it's 10:30

Phil: Exactly.

Dan: i'll go to bed later

Dan: don't worry

Phil: When's later?

Dan: dunno

Phil: Please get some sleep.

Dan: fine mum

Phil: Dan, you have to sleep. It's important.

Phil: Are you asleep? No. What time is it? 10:45

Dan: i'm busy

Phil: You can do it in the morning.

Dan: noooooo

Phil: If i was there right now I'd force you.

Dan: well you aren't

Dan: :(

Phil: I want you to sleep but on the other hand I want you to keep talking to me.

Dan: haha

Dan: i'll just keep talking to you them

Dan: ^then

Phil: Urgh! I want you to sleep though!

Dan: sleep is for the dead

Phil: Daaaaaaan! Go to sleep!

Phil: Wait, we can keep talking until 11. At 11 we'll go to sleep.

Dan: fine

Phil: It's 11.

Dan: :(

Phil: You need to sleep. Good night Dan.

Dan: Noooo! I don't want to stop talking to you

Phil: I'll talk to you in the morning love.

Dan: :( ok. Goodnight Philly

Phil: Goodnight Bear. Love you. :)

Dan: love you too


	27. Hearing

_You guys (and gals) love soulmate AUs so much, here's another! Sorry it's so short. ~gum wrapper._

 **I don't own Dan and Phil.**

* * *

 _Hearing_

 _Dan's p.o.v._

I can't hear anything. My whole world is noiseless. There isn't anything at all and never has been. Maybe there never will be.

But I'm determined to find my soulmate. I want to hear music, which people say (or write) can make you feel different moods, I want to hear my mum's voice, I want to hear birds, I want to hear the piano I play and not just feel joy in pressing the keys.

The first thing I will ever hear, is their voice though. For some reason, their voice is the only thing my ears can hear right now and until I hear it, I'll never hear anything.

I'm excited. Me, Daniel James Howell, the person who avoids human contact at all costs, am excited to hear the world. Mum and Dad say it's loud but I have no idea what that means. The dictionary says it means capable of producing much noise so I'm hoping not to be disappointed.

In school we are given these iPads to communicate with and today I see a new, interesting message: **we have a new student.**

As the other students see this they all look around. Scanning faces, and writing quick notes to each other.

And then a capitalized bold message appears: **PLEASE LOOK TO THE FRONT!**

I'm one of the first to see and look up to see a tall boy with black hair like mine and very pale skin. He's writing on a paper to the teacher so I can't see his face properly. If only he would look up. The teacher writes something too and then I hear something.

Something like what's been described as a laugh. It happens so fast and so clearly I jump and knock a book to the floor. Nobody notices but the new boy does jump a little. I sit up straight and stare at the boy intensely. He did something. He made sound and I could hear it and then he could hear my book falling.

 **Class, this is Philip Lester.**

 _But, you can call me Phil. I like it better._

I stare at Phil. Begging him silently to make make more noise. I look back down.

 **Phil, you can sit next to Daniel back there. The boy with brown hair.**

I jump and then see Phil coming to my table. I feel my eyes pop and quickly hurry to look busy with homework.

The class continues as normal until a piece of blue graphing paper slides across the desk and hits my elbow.

I hear it slide across the desk.

"Whoa!" I cry and jump away.

Only Phil and the teacher notices but the teacher ignores me.

Phil however, leans over. "Can you hear?"

Despite never hearing words before I know what he's saying and I know how to respond on my own. Maybe that's part of the soulmate thing?

I stare at him in awe. I nod.

A long smile stretches across his face. "Me too. Only just now."

"So, you just started hearing?" I ask to clarify.

"Yeah. When I you dropped your book." He points.

I bend over and grab the book before quickly shoving it in my bag. "You know what that means?" I mumble.

"We're soulmates." He says.

I nod.

And then right there, in the back of the classroom, he kisses me.

"Sorry." He mutters quickly drawing back. His blue eyes big and startled.

I shake my head. I want him to kiss me again. His lips were nice. "Don't be. I… liked it."


	28. Manipulation

_If you got a comment, leave it below so I can know. ;) ~gum wrapper._

 **I don't own any of the people mentioned.**

* * *

 _Manipulation_

 _Dan's p.o.v._

It's _AmazingPhil_ 's birthday at the end of the month! Subscribe to him so he can have a birthday morning email saying four million subscribers!

I hit the tweet button. Maybe Phil will finally get the recognition he deserves. Maybe people will realize how amazing Phil really is.

You see, it's always annoyed me that Phil has less subscribers than me. He was here first, he is better than me, Phil works just as hard and I have about double! It's not fair. So I've finally decided to step in and for his birthday I will see to it that he gets what he rightly deserves.

I make sure that every social media site I have has the same message because I will get my way. Phil will get the subscriber count he deserves.

"Dan are you trying to manipulate my subscriber count?" Phil asks sitting on the sofa next to me.

"Oh no. I would never do that." I say sarcasm thick in my voice. "Why would think I was?"

"Dan, I want subscribers because I'm good at making videos. Not because you guilt tripped _your_ subscribers." He explains leaning over to put his head on my shoulder.

"But it's your _birthday_ Phil!"

I get a tiny chuckle. "That doesn't mean anything."

A frown settles onto my face. "But you deserve it Phil! You deserve to have just as many subscribers as me! You actually deserve to have more than me!"

"There's a reason some people aren't subscribed to me Dan." Phil's voice has a hint of sadness to it and it breaks my heart.

"PHIL! PHIL! Get up! Get up!" I cheer. "It's your birthday get your ass up!"

He sits up from bed lazily. "What are you yelling about?"

"Get up! Come on! Get up!" I chant. "Come on!"

Phil blinks. "Why are you so… excited? It's one thirty-four in the morning." He looks for his glasses.

I sigh. Why does he pick _today_ to be slow?! "Look!" I show Phil the live feed of his subscriber count.

"Four million?" He asks sleepily.

"Yes! Yes I told you!"

He sits up a bit more.

"I was up all night watching it!" I say happily. "You have four million subscribers!"

Phil finally wakes up enough to understand. "Four million?!"

"YES! You did it! You got four million" I tackle him in a hug and never want to let go. " _Four million_! I'm so proud of you!"

I can't see his face but I know he's smiling. "Thank you."

"Thank me?"

He laughs. "I know you manipulated it but it stills feels really nice. Like people like me."

"Well I like you." I say and kiss him. "No, I love you."

"I love you too Dan."


	29. Asleep

_I think it's time for another Tilly chapter. Also, if you haven't noticed, I removed that last chapter. It wasn't good and I need to improve on it. :) ~gum wrapper._

 **I don't own Dan and Phil and these events are made up.**

* * *

 _Asleep_

 _Phil's p.o.v._

Tilly sits on my lap and is on the verge of falling asleep. Her bright yellow blanket still draped partially over Dan but mostly covering me and her. Only her face and fingertips are able to be seen from within the cocoon of warmth she's created. Her chocolatey brown hair sticks to her pale face with static and her dark turquoise eyes are close to closing.

Dan's fallen asleep. His head on my shoulder and Tilly keeps laying her head on my chest just below Dan's and then sitting up to try to stop from falling asleep.

"Til, you can sleep if you want. It's okay." I whisper so I don't wake Dan.

She shakes her head which cause the whole yellow blanket to shake. "No. You'll be all alone."

"I won't be alone. I'll have you two right here." I say.

"Nobody to talk to." She's the sweetest, most caring, little girl in the world when she wants to be. Her voice is so soft and fragile right now it's heart melting.

"That's okay. I don't need to talk to anyone." I kiss her forehead gently. "You do need to sleep."

Tilly slowly lies her head back down on my chest. She pulls the blanket off her head and her wavy hair falls around her shoulders and also mixes with Dan's. I smile at the matching color. Her eyes close and it's not long before I hear her breathing deepen.

I realize I'm snuggled up with my family, my beautiful family, and smile happily. I never want to break this moment. I don't want them to wake up and leave this position. I want us to stay here happy and perfect forever.


	30. Soundtrack

_I really like this one guys! I've changed my style (again) and decided I just needed to focus on emotions and details as they often make for a better story. :D ~gum wrapper._

 **Dan Howell and Phil Lester do not belong to any person; including me.**

* * *

 _Soundtrack_

 _Phil's p.o.v._

 _Tap._

 _Tap-tap._

 _Tap._

 _Tap-tap-tap._

 _Tap._

The rhythm repeats over and over. His pointer and middle fingers playing on a book cover like it's a trampoline.

 _Tap-tap._

His right hand props up his head as he looks down at a page. His soft brown hair falling over the side of his face so I can't see their chocolaty warmth from beside him.

 _Tap._

 _Tap-tap-tap._

 _Tap._

I think about shushing him. Telling him to stop making tiny drumbeats and to actually read the book.

I think about saying it, but I don't.

 _Tap._

 _Tap-tap._

 _Tap._

 _Tap-tap-tap._

"Dan, what are you thinking about." I ask because he hasn't turned a page in ages so I know he isn't actually reading.

"Everything." He answers simply. His voice normal. Nothing's off or out of sorts.

I keep watching him. My laptop open but not on as I watch his slender fingers keep up their song.

"What are you thinking about right now?"

The song gets a little faster and changes beat.

 _Tap-tap._

 _Tap-tap-tap._

 _Tap-tap._

 _Tap-tap-tap._

"You."

"Me? What about me?" I ask concerned in the change in the jumping of his fingers.

"Right now this thing you do. This really, really, distracting thing." He moves his head and I see one of his eyes as his hair shifts.

"A good distracting?"

He doesn't answer at first but his fingers excitedly go faster.

 _Tap-tap-tap._

 _Tap-tap-tap._

"Yeah, a good distracting."

"What is it?" Why is his finger tapping getting faster? It's like the soundtrack to a movie. Getting faster and faster as the most vital scene approaches.

 _Tap-tap-tap._

 _Tap-tap-tap._

Dan looks at me fully. His eyes finding mine easily.

I've already memorized his face but I do it now anyway. I reprint into my brain every little detail. The way his dimple has a shadow, they way his lips are cracked with lack of chap-stick, the way his eyes are the same two mixed shades of brown as always, everything about his perfect face.

Suddenly, his fingers slow down. Barely beating on the book cover. The height of the story would be over now if this was a movie.

I quickly change my focus from a single spot on his face to his whole face. He's smirking.

"Sorry." I mumble and then give an awkward laugh.

 _Tap._

 _Tap._

 _Tap._

Dan ignores my apology from staring at him. "You bite your tongue when you laugh."

"That's distracting?"

"Not so much as distracting as… I'm not sure of the word. Cute?"

I laugh again and realize I do bite my tongue when I laugh.

"Attractive. It's very attractive." He says apparently finding the right word.

I lean over and press a kiss to his lips. Dan responds instantly. His hand coming up to hold my face so I can't back away.

My heart speeds up like Dan's little beaten song did. If this was a movie, the soundtrack would be in it's greatest finale.


	31. Revealing

_Only 8 or so chaters left after this! Maybe I'll start a collection of Tilly growing up with Dan and Phil…_

 **Dan Howell and Phil Lester are not owned by me.**

* * *

 _Revealing_

 _Dan's p.o.v._

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" I ask as Tilly tugs on her long dark brown would-be waves (I've taught her to straighten her hair).

Phil shrugs. "It'll be fine and we can't keep hiding Tilly forever."

Tilly nods. " nine years is long."

We've "had" Tilly since she was three years old. She's now twelve and Phil and Tilly have been pressuring me to give in to "revealing" Tilly.

I sigh. "Alright, fine."

So I do the normal 'liveshow in a few' heads up and Tilly sits on the floor playing with the threads coming from the hole she ripped into her jeans a few months ago while beating up a kid. I recognize her nervous habit of having something to focus on and something to keep her hands occupied.

"It'll be fine. Don't worry." Phil says sitting next to her.

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" She asks repeating my earlier question. "What if something happens?"

"Like what?" He prompts.

"What if…" She waits. Considering I'm assuming many different strange scenarios. "I say something, and since there will be so many people watching, someone doesn't like it and I get in trouble?"

"Believe me, if you got in trouble every time you said something someone didn't like Dan would probably live in a town called trouble." Phil says. I laugh.

She scrunches her nose. "That's a bad town name. Why wouldn't you call it 'trouble maker town' or something like that?"

"Focus." I say nudging her foot with mine. "You're getting off topic."

"Oops. Maybe I should live in a town called tangent."

We decide to simply have her sitting between us (it would be a tight fit but not if she kind of sits on my lap) and she would pipe up when she wanted. Phil and Tilly then planned out how they would reveal her to be me and Phil's daughter.

"Hello Internet." I say in my customary greeting.

"Hi!" Phil chimes in.

Tilly remains quiet. Her head swiveling from Phil to the laptop to me.

People immediately go straight for Tilly.

"Let's say hi to some people, okay, ummm, hello MariMoon, Jacqueline443-" I list off a bunch more names before the comments go truly insane.

Phil laughs as I look for something to talk about besides Tilly. Tilly buries her face in Phil's shoulder as she sees her name repeatedly come up.

"Oh, hmm? You guys are all asking the same question. I wonder why because there is certainly nothing new to talk about." I tease and Tilly allows herself a laugh and a glance out of Phil's shoulder.

"Let's see… What have we been up to?" I say finding one stray question. "Well, Phil bought another houseplant-"

"It was calling to me! I mean it was the cutest little cactus-"

"Cactus aren't cute." Tilly mumbles slowly coming out of hiding.

"Cactus can be very cute. You just have to see beyond the spikes." Phil continues.

I laugh and shake my head. "Cactus are plants, Phil. They don't have any hidden meaning. You can't look "beyond" the spikes."

Tilly laughs again and sits up a bit more.

"Anyway, he dropped it off the counter and the little pot it was in smashed." I say to forward the conversation. "There was dirt and pot pieces everywhere."

Suddenly Tilly gets over her stage fright. "Not to mention cactus spikes are invisible on the floor! I've been picking them out of my socks all week!"

"Yes. She does live with us." Phil teases reading the flurries of comments.

I stifle my laugh as I read comments that are all variations of 'WHO IS SHE?!' and 'first Phan becomes real and now this?!'. It is rather fun to be a troll.

"Why do they care so much about me being here?" Tilly asks knowingly.

"Let's see." I say and scroll through comments. "They want to know who you are, why you're here, other things like that. They're stalkers really."

Phil laughs and plays with some of her straightened hair.

Tilly sticks her tongue out at him. Phil returns the gesture.

"No fighting you two. Oh this is a good question," I say to prompt our revealing of Tilly. "Tilly, who is your favorite? Me or Phil?"

She frowns. "That's a mean question."

"You just don't want to say it's me right?" I say leaning over so I can put my head on hers.

"I like you both the same."

Phil braids her hair like she taught him. "You can say you like me better. He just has a big ego."

The comments have literally gone insane. Everyone is freaking out about us and especially about Tilly.

"I love you just the same!" She pouts.

"Come on, Til." I smile.

"No."

"Tilllllllly." Phil sings.

I hold my breath. Tilly and Phil planned this so well.

"Daddy, I like you just as much as Papa." She says turning to Phil and gently kissing his nose. "Papa, I like you just as much as Daddy." She then kisses my nose.

"Okay, so who's still alive?" Phil asks and we both lean back forward to find something else to talk about.


	32. Paper Airplanes

_So how about another soulmate AU eh? Sorry this took so long my test anxiety has been acting up, midterms and all. ~gum wrapper._

 **I don't own AmazingPhil or Danisnotonfire.**

* * *

 _Paper Airplane_

 _Phil's p.o.v._

The very day after my fifth birthday the black tattoo name appeared on the inside of my wrist like it does to everyone.

Daniel James Howell

"First day at the big school!" My mum cries happily. "Come on, hurry and eat your breakfast."

I practically choke down all my cereal and then quickly jump up from the old wooden dinning table and rush to grab my bag (packed the night before) and I tie my shoes.

My eye catches on the name on my wrist and the burning desire to meet the person behind the name makes me tie a little faster.

I frown as I finish my hike up a third flight of stairs. Why does my class have to be on the third floor? Isn't it bad enough I have to go to math?

"Room 378, room 378, room 378." I chant passing door after door. When I find the right classroom I sigh in relief.

Quickly I find a seat towards the back and sit down as the bell rings. The person behind me coughs and it catches my attention more than it should but I don't pay any attention.

The bubbly young woman with black hair at the front of the room starts listing off names. Pretty much all classes have been listing off names and listening to rules that will be long forgotten by week four. I ignore her knowing my ears will pick up on my name when she says it.

I don't count for my ears to pick up on someone else's name though.

"Daniel Howell?"

I instinctively flip over my wrist and read the three already memorized words written there: Daniel James Howell

It has to be him. I sit up straight and quickly hide my wrist again.

"Here." The boy behind me calls. "Call me Dan."

The names continue.

Every cell in my body is telling me to turn around and demand to see the wrist of 'Daniel Howell' but I don't. I only discover that my ears are tuned in to every sound that comes from the desk behind me. I hear the pen scribbling across a page in a notebook that belongs to 'Daniel Howell', I hear the light tapping his sneaker makes on the polished white tiled floor and I hear his slight humming.

It's driving me crazy.

"Philip Lester?"

"Here." I say my voice barely working.  
The humming, foot tapping and pen scribbling stops.

I smirk a little. "You can call me Phil though."

The list of names continues again and I'm hyper aware of the lack of sound coming from 'Daniel Howell.'

Suddenly a paper airplane lands on my desk from over my shoulder. I catch it before it falls off.

It has only one word on it: _Hi_

I don't turn around but quickly scribble back a reply and toss it carelessly.

The plane comes back within seconds: _You know it too right? That you're my soulmate?_

My head nods the answer without my consent. I feel my neck grow warm.

"Phil."

I try to hide my blushing face by not turning around.

"Phil!" A second airplane floats onto my desk.

My face gets hotter. What if he think's I'm a fail of a soulmate?

" _Phil! Turn around!_ " Dan hisses. " _Phiiiiiiiiiil!_ "

There's no hiding it now. I turn around to face Dan.

He stares at me. His eyes raking my face as I study his. I feel my face get even hotter. How have I not spontaneously combusted?

"You… you're…" He struggles to say anything.

"Yes?" I ask nervously. Am I a disappointment?

"You're much more handsome than I could have imagined." He mumbles as his face turns pink it but I can tell exactly what he said.

I laugh quietly and Dan meets my eyes carefully. He shifts his brown hair away from his eyes and their magnificent light brown color becoming my automatic new favorite color.

"Mr. Lester, would you please face the front?" The teacher says making several people look at us.

"Sorry." I say and quickly turn around.

It's only a few seconds before another paper airplane lands on my desk.


	33. Morning

_Hey guys. Sorry is this seems incomplete. It's part of something else but a certain someone is not letting me post the rest because it's sad. :) Enjoy! ~gum wrapper. P.S. certain person, don't wrote an angry comment please. :D_

 **I don't own AmazingPhil or Danisnotonfire.**

* * *

 _Morning_

 _Dan's p.o.v._

The sun is shining brightly but it's warm yellow glow missed waking me from sleep by two hours. I was woken up in a much better way than late February sun though.

"Papa!" Tilly cries jumping onto my stomach.

"Ow." I say and then push her onto the bed beside me so I can keep sleeping.

She puts her tiny warm hands on my face. "Papa, wake up." I want her to never take her hands away from my face. She's radiating happiness and innocence.

"No. I'm sleeping."

"Pleeeease? So you can say bye?" She then makes my fatal move: she presses her nose and forehead against mine.

I can't resist her when she does this. It's the goddamn cutest thing. I open my eyes and her dark teal ones light up with joy.

"You're awake now!" She moves her head from mine and sits back on her feet.

I pull her back towards me and pin her to my chest in a strong hug. She tries to squirm away but I'm far stronger than a fix year old girl.

"Stop moving." I complain. "You're leaving me for a week so I have to get in my cuddling."

Tilly stops trying to escape at my words and snakes an arm around me in a half hug. Her head rests against my collarbone and I can smell her cinnamony hair soap. It oddly reminds me of the taste of maple syrup and vanilla ice cream.

"Why aren't you coming too?" She pouts; her voice muffled.

I rest my chin on her head. "It's just a you and Daddy trip."

"But I'm gonna miss you."

I laugh. "Of course you are. But you'll be with Daddy and he's so much more entertaining."

"Yeah, Daddy's awes-" Tilly tenses. "I smell pancakes."

We both quickly venture to the kitchen where an amazing person is making food.

"You got him up! Good job." Phil says giving Tilly a plate with a warm pancake.

"Actually I only got up-" I pause to give Phil a kiss. His lips are slightly sugary. "Because she said there were pancakes and pancakes are literally the best thing."

Phil laughs and then hands me a plate with pancakes.

"Although," I say with consideration. "The person making the pancakes is way better than any pancake."


	34. Part One (POSSIBLE TRIGGERS)

_Hey,_ _ **STRONG TRIGGER WARNING! DEATH, SUICIDE, DON'T TRY TO SKIP PARTS, PROTECT YOURSELF!**_ _**I will post another, non-triggering chapter like this one though.**_ _With utmost concern for your health ~gum wrapper_

 **Also, I don't own Dan or Phil but you already knew that.**

* * *

 _Dan's p.o.v._

Phil speaks scarily calmly through the bathroom door. "You can't stop me Dan."

I try to jimmy the lock but still have no luck. "Phil! Phil no, please, please, don't!" I shove my body into the door to try to break it.

"They don't like me Dan. I've been pretending for too long."

"No! No, that's true Phil!" Tears stream down my face. "Phil open the door!"

I don't hear anything. My panic increases to extreme insanity.

"PHIL! PHIL PLEASE!" I knock and shove and abuse the door separating me from my one true love in life.

Suddenly, the door swings open and I fall to the floor. I've broken the door.

"Phil!" I scream and hurry to find things to stop the bleeding on his arms and wrists.

"I love you Dan." Phil says as I attempt to prevent the inevitable.

"I love you too Phil." I mumble and hold him against me. He's still bleeding. His face paling… blood on his white shirt.

"No, no, no, PHIL!" His name is torn from my throat as I wake up from the nightmare.

My eyes open as I wake up and I lay there, breathing hard and crying for a long time because of Phil. My sun, my world, my Phil. Why can't I figure out if that was a nightmare or real life? My chest literally hurts and my stomach has worked itself into a knot of fear and anxiety.

I quickly get up and venture to Phil's room.

"Dan?" Phil asks yawning and seeing me standing over his bed.

"Phil?!" I'm frantic. My breathing is fast. "Phil, Phil, Phil, Phil!"

"What's wrong?" He asks sitting up.

I hesitates before answering childishly. "I had a nightmare."

I have nightmares occasionally and my solution is always to come find him in his room and spend the rest of the night there (not that he complains).

"What was it about? I want to help you. I always help you don't I?"

My voice is stronger when I speak again. "You make everything easier."

He smiles at my confession. It's often when I'm tired like this that he hears little comments that he'll use to make me blush in the morning because I didn't mean to say such things.

"So do you want to talk about the nightmare?" Phil asks pulling me close to him. I'm still breathing really heavy and I still feel like any minute he might disappear.

"Uhm, sure." I say putting my head on his chest. "It… you…" I realize I'm crying.

"Dan! Dan, shhh, it's alright. Look, I'm right here."

"You… you…" My voice cracks. "I couldn't help you."

"Couldn't help me with what?" He asks gently.

In a burst of courage I spit it out: "Phil you killed yourself and I couldn't help! There was too much blood… I couldn't help."

I hear his breath catch. "No, no, Dan look I'm right here. See? And I'm okay. Nothing's wrong."

"Yeah…. Yeah, you're okay." I mumble. My breathing is slowly returning to normal.

Phil presses a kiss to my hair. "Dreams aren't real; bad or good. Just your mind on overdrive."

I don't answer. I only close my eyes and listen to Phil's heartbeat. It's strong and even like it should be. Another strangled sob escapes my lips.

"I'm right here Dan." Phil kisses my head again. "I'm okay, I'm safe, I'm not going anywhere."

I snuggle deeper into his warm embrace. "Don't you ever... don't ever go anywhere Philly."

He laughs very quietly. "I could never leave you."

The fear and panic I had when I entered Phil's room has suddenly evaporated like a shallow puddle in the warm summer sun. How does Phil do that? How can he make it all better just like that?

I don't think about it too long. Phil keeps kissing my head and repeating that everything's alright and I fall asleep.

Luckily, there's no more nightmares tonight.


	35. Part Two (no triggers)

_So some parts might be the same as the part one of this chapter but I started this one first and finished the other first… I'm too tired to be writing right now. ~gum wrapper._

 **Dan Howell and Phil Lester are their own people and this is a work of fiction.**

* * *

 _Phil's p.o.v._

I answer my phone despite it being 3am. "Dan?" I ask yawning.

"Phil." His voice is quiet and small. As if he's holding the phone far away from him. "I woke you up didn't I?"

"What's wrong Bear?" I ask using my nickname for him and skipping his question.

He hesitates before answering. "I had a nightmare."

I bite my cheek to keep from laughing. "And I'm not there to help." Dan has nightmares occasionally and his solution is usually to come find me in my room and spend the rest of the night there. But tonight, I'm at my parents for a visit.

"Yeah… So I thought maybe, if I could just…" He sighs. "I'm bugging you aren't I? I shouldn't have called."

"No, no don't hang up!" I say frantically so he won't hang up. "I want to help you. I always help you don't I?"

His voice is stronger when he speaks again. "You make everything easier."

I smile at his confession. It's often when he's tired like this that I hear little comments that make me blush simply because he means them so sincerely.

"Do you want to talk about the nightmare?"

"No. It's… it's not… no."

I nod. That's usually his answer. "Okay, so what do we usually do?" I ask prompting him.

"You aren't here. I can't cuddle someone who's not here." Dan protests weakly.

"Get my pillow, report back." I say with another yawn.

I hear him shuffle around and then he mumbles "done."

"Great. Okay, now snuggle in all your blankets-" Dan interrupts me. "I just stayed in your room."

I smile again. "Snuggle into _my_ blankets and pretend I'm there with you."

"Okay." He trails off into a yawn.

"It was just a figment of your imagination. I say like always. "You are perfectly safe, I'm safe, everyone we know is safe... Everything is going to be perfectly fine."

"You will never know that." Dan counters. "Yet you will always say that."

"But you will always believe me." I counter back.

"True." Dan says with another yawn.

I wait for a minute to collect my thoughts and then continue. "Your nightmare is over now. It's already in the past you just have to move on and think about something else."

"Okay."

I think I'm getting him to fall asleep. I continue only now I speak more softly. "Whatever your nightmare was about it can't hurt you know. Not with me here."

"You aren't here." Dan says sleepily.

"Yes I am. Just through the phone."

"Oh… I'd much rather prefer it if you were here though." He just barely whispers.

"I quit wish I was there too… I love you Dan."

He doesn't answer. I'm sure he's already asleep.

"Goodnight Daniel. I love you so much and as long as you have me, no nightmares can hurt you."


	36. Running Into You

_Okay, I'm thinking about making this it's own story after i finish up this in three or so chapters but thought I should post this strange little AU here first! :) ~gum wrapper._

 **None of this is mine except for the plot!**

* * *

 _Dan's p.o.v._

 _Running Into You_

My feet slap the pavement as I run further and further away. I run down the center of the road in the pouring rain in all black clothes but am in no danger of getting run over. No one is awake at this time of night. I run faster in an attempt to push everything far behind me.

It's so dark I can't see anything. Yet, I know my breath is coming out in smoke-like-puffs before me, I know it's pouring rain, I know that I'm running past houses and buildings but the happy families inside can't see me and I can't see them. I think their lives are better without seeing me sprinting past.

My lungs ache and beg for mercy but I push myself. I will not stop until I have gone too far to turn back.

Suddenly, I crash into something. I hear a voice mumble something like words. I ran into a person? I quickly get up and just as I am about to run away again, it grabs my wrist. I try to pull away.

"Lemme go! I have to keep going!"

"Where are you going?" It's a male voice.

"No where." I spat still trying to free my wrist.

"Why are you running?"

"I need to run."

"Who are you running from?"

A huge parade of chills creeps up my back. I try to take a step back but he still has my wrist. "I don't know."

A flashlight suddenly shines at my soaked black sneakers. I look up but the light is feeble and I can barely make out the outline of a face.

"Do you want to come home with me? I think I have some warmer clothes that might fit you that aren't sopping wet."

The act of kindness startles me. No one has ever offered me anything.

"I… I couldn't pay you back."

"You don't have to. You only have to tell me why you are running, where you are running, and from whom you are running."

Something inside me, something good, tells me I should go. Tells me I can trust him… I just hope I'm not agreeing to my own kidnapping.

"Okay, deal." I agree.

His hand slips down my cold wrist and into my hand. Something in my stomach flips over and I feel my face grow warm despite the freezing rain dripping down my face from my (probably curly) brown hair.

I don't know this person yet I feel safe and protected.

"What's your name?" He asks. "So I don't have to say 'hey you.'"

I laugh and feel obligated to tell him. "Dan."

His hand tightens it's grip on mine. I can't help but say that I more than like it.

We continue our walk in the rain but the water is no longer beating on me. It's falling like a fine mist. The morning sun is also starting to penetrate the heavy gray clouds so the world is being hugged by a thick gray fog. I look down and at the sight his hand I grin. I'm not imagining him.

"Here we go. Watch your st-" I fall forward and land on my chest on slush covered steps.

"Ow." I mumble and go to push myself up.

"I'm sorry I should have said something sooner!" A light flickers on and I'm able to see him. All of him not just his hand or outline. "Are you okay?"

My lungs ache again from hitting the steps too hard and my head spins but I try to sit up. I look up at his face but it's closer than I thought.

His pink lips are slightly parted and our breath clouds dance and mix into one. I watch them and then drag my eyes back to his face. My head is pounding as I take in his paper white face with rosy red cheeks from the rain and cold, his black bangs that sticks across his forehead, and his pretty kaleidoscope eyes that are mostly blue but also a little green and yellow.

"Dan? Are you alright?"

"Ah…" I wince as I stand up fully and my left ankle gives out. "I think so?"

He sees through me. "Come on, I'll take care of you."

"I feel like a puppy you found on the street." I comment.

"Hahaha, you kind of are." For some reason this makes those pesky "nervous butterflies" jump around in my stomach.

The door swings open as he shoves it with his body. I follow by hopping on my right foot.

"You look pitiful." Suddenly his arms are around my waist and I'm guided to a wooden chair in a small mostly white kitchen. I look at my reflection in the glass of the black stove. I look as bad as I feel. Hair sticking flat to my face and eyes showing how little sleep I've had.. I look like a mess.

"I'll get you some clothes so you don't get sick." He mumbles and I nod. My head screams with the action. I wonder if I have a concussion. I've never had one before.

I see no signs of anyone else living here. Just… hmm, I don't know his name.

"Okay, um, here's the basic clothes and a sweatshirt." He announces from a hallway. I can hear the floor creaking as he comes back.

"What's your name?" I ask.

He returns to the kitchen as he answers. "Sorry, my name's Phil. I should've told you earlier."

"It's alright." I mumble. My ankle shoots burning pain up my leg as I stand to take Phil's clothes. I do my best not to show it but I get the odd feeling he knows anyway.

"The bathroom-" Phil guides me down a brightly lit hallway and into a blue bathroom. "Is right here."

"Thanks again." I say without meeting his eyes.

"I wasn't going to leave you out there. Unlike most people I have a heart."

The feeling of being a lost puppy comes back to me. "Haha."

Phil the closes the door and I quickly change from my clothes and into Phil's. The pain in my ankle increases as I limp out to the kitchen.

"You're limping." Phil notes instantly.

"I'll be-" I wince as pain causes me to bend over to touch my ankle out of instinct.

Apparently he's much stronger than he looks because he half carries me to a squishy armchair.

I sit there taking in the bright sun-light room and Phil gets ice cubes from the freezer and wraps them in a paper towel.

His hands press the ice to my ankle. I lean to hold it there and my fingers slip in between Phil's. Before I can say anything those damn butterflies nearly kill me and my face definitely heats up. Am I falling for him? I think so. Is that bad?

Phil disappears back down the bathroom hallway. He returns quickly with a stool and a pillow without a pillow case. I assume there's a closet in the hall but have no idea.

"Here," Phil sets the pillow on the stool and then I gingerly move my ankle there. He arranges the ice pack on my ankle.

Since I'm stuck with no place to go I figure he's going to interrogate me now. Sure, enough, I'm correct.

"Why were you running?" He asks sitting in the floor by my feet.

"I needed to clear my head." I say truthfully. "There was so much to think about."

He nods. "Anything particular?"

"Not really."

"Okay, that was easy, next question: where were you going?"

I shrug. "No idea. I just… wanted to run."

 _His laugh is cute._ I comment silently.

"Last question, who were you running from? You were clearly running from someone."

I sigh but can't bring myself to lie to him. "Myself."

"What do you mean?"

"I was just angry with myself for being me. I'm never treated or talked to nicely by anyone and I finally have had enough."

Phil looks _really_ good from my point of view. His face is like artwork and far better than any famous portrait in any fancy museum. I almost say that before realizing how he might react.

"Well maybe you just haven't found the right people. Maybe where you're supposed to be isn't where you were."

"How poetic." I say dryly.

 _There's little lines that appear by his eyes when he laughs_ I notice. _They're cute._

"I don't know where the hell I'm supposed to be then." I mumble.

"You could stay here for a while."


	37. Fourth Option

_HOW ARE YOU ALL TODAY?! I've got like, 3 ideas ready to go so keep posted! :D ~gum wrapper._

 **I don't own Dan and Phil as they are real people.**

* * *

 _Fourth Option_

 _Dan's p.o.v._

"Phil?" I call not even waiting before opening his bedroom door. "I need to borrow your-"

I stop as my eyes fall on Phil's sleeping form. He's wrapped up in blankets and I smile as he sighs in his sleep. He looks so innocent and adorable.

My brain starts to think of ways to deal with the situation. I could just take what I need to film and leave, I could wake him up and ask to borrow the stuff, I could just leave and wait until he wakes up tomorrow, or I could select the preferred fourth option of climbing into bed beside him and falling asleep.

It isn't a difficult decision.

Carefully, I avoid stepping on anything in his messy room and then slowly lift the blankets off him. He doesn't wake up as I lay down next to him and I pull the blankets over us quickly.

I'm facing him so I'm able to see his chest rise and fall with every deep breath he takes. My breathing slowly falls into sync with his and then I'm asleep too.

 _Phil's p.o.v._

"Dan?" I whisper with a smile. He doesn't stir so I kiss his forehead.

His eyes slowly flutter open. Dan blinks sleepily at me.

"When did you get here love?" I ask.

"You looked so cozy… and I…" He stops to yawn, "you're nice to cuddle."

I laugh. "Fine. We can sleep in for a little longer."

"Yay." Dan mumbles before snuggling deeper into my arms.


	38. February 14th

_Hiiiiiiiii… Sorry I've been for the lack of me recently. Ah, don't hold me to the exact timing and details of this fic please. I'm just going along innocently here._

 **I don't own anyone or any holiday mentioned.**

* * *

February 14th

Dan's p.o.v.

 **1 new calendar event.**

I stare at my phone angrily. What's the point of a holiday if the person you're meant to spend it with isn't with you or isn't even anywhere near you?

Tomorrow is the day some wait for excitedly, some wait for tomorrow with mixed emotions, some dread, and some don't even know (or care) that there's anything to celebrate…. **Valentine's day.**

"I don't care anymore! Phil's a stupid fluffing hour away at his own stupid fluffing university! I'm alone and you're going to have to fluffing get over it!" I shout to the empty (note the word _empty_ ) room. "A goddamn hour away from me."

 **1 new calendar event.**

I don't go to silence my phone. I can't for some reason. Instead, I lay back on my bed and close my eyes wishing I could simply close my eyes and drift off to sleep.

"One freaking hour away and we both have school. There's nothing I can do. I'm a fail for a reason you know."

But right as I say those words, right then the best, most brilliant plan ever comes to mind: _Why don't you skip school to see Phil? It's not like you'd pay attention to class anyway._

Instantly, my eyes snap open and I jump up from my bed. I grab my laptop and look for a train going someplace near Phil.

"There we go. An hour." I mutter to myself finding one. I've decided that talking to myself isn't any stranger than talking to a camera for hours and now do it constantly.

I look around my messy room, decide the only thing I really need is money and my phone, then leave without another thought.

After the train ride I was pretty sure I knew where I was going. I was confident in my map (my phone) to tell me just about exactly where I could find his school…. Oh was I wrong.

But, three hours later puts the clock at ten thirty in the evening and I'm finally in a place I recognize as Phil's university. Now I've just got to remember where I'm supposed go from here.

...It's two in the morning when I finally find Phil himself and I'm so incredibly tired I wouldn't mind actually dying in order to catch up on sleep.

"Dan?" He asks opening his front door.

"Happy Valentine's day… can I sleep on your bed for a few hours?" I more groan than actually speak.

Phil grins. "You did this for Valentine's day? You came to see me at…" He checks his phone, "two forty seven in the morning… can you call it morning yet?... just for Valentine's day?"  
"And because I missed you because I'm clingy." I mumble with a yawn.

He laughs and pulls me into a hug. I breath in his familiar scent as I bury my face in his neck. I don't ever want to move. I want to just stay right here in this little moment for infinity. Unfortunately, I'm exhausted.

"Come on," Phil says as I yawn. "Let's get you to bed before you pass out here."

"But I want to stay right here with you!" I sleepily protest. "I've missed you so much and hugging you after at least three months is so…" I can't think or any good words. "Nice?"

"Yes, you have a point it is very… nice, but you are literally barely awake right now."

I sigh and give in. "Okay… but you have to stay with me."

"Of course I will."


	39. Outcome

_Okay you guys, this is the second to last one unless I get more inspiration! ~gum wrapper._

 **I don't own anybody mentioned.**

* * *

 _Dan's p.o.v._

 _Outcome_

I take a deep breath and then quickly form the whole sentence in my head. _Phil, I like you and you like me so do. you. want. to. be. my…_ But as I approach the word I stop thinking and panic.

"Come on!" I scold. "Get it together! It's either a yes or a no and it's not likely to be no… why would it be no?"

 _ **See?! You're getting it! It's a simple question with a simple answer!**_ My heart supports the argument.

"Are you talking to yourself?" Phil asks poking his head through my doorway. His rather blue eyes look worried.

"Yes." I say icily. "I am."

Phil nods and then carries on to his room. I watch him leave and then continue to verbally attack myself.

"You should hurry while you still know there's a good chance the answer will be yes. You shouldn't keep standing here just thinking about it or you'll believe the answer is no." I mumble.

 _ **But what if you're wrong? What if the answer was never yes? What if it will never be yes?**_ My head chimes in. I let out a wail of confusion, anger, and sadness before letting myself fall backwards onto my comforting bed. I rub the back of my palm against the black, grey, and white squares absently.

"Are you okay?" Phil asks reappearing.

"No." I moan. "I'm not okay at all."

He flops down beside me. "What's wrong?"

My brain doesn't focus on the question right away. No, instead it focuses on how close his face is to mine. How beautifully pink his smooth lips are… how kissable they are.

 _ **Stop it! You aren't supposed to be thinking this at all!**_ My head scolds.

My heart retorts sharply with: _**Well why not? What's it really matter?**_

Phil asks again what's wrong but this time my internal fighting distracts me.

 _ **It just matters in the way that it could hurt your friendship. And what would you do then?**_ I'm starting to side with my brain. It knows how bad that would be.

But my heart will not back down easily. _**It won't. Stop worrying and just ask the damn question! Do you have any reason to think it will end badly?**_

"Phil?" My lips feel numb as I speak.

"Yes?"

"I've been thinking," I trail off and tune back into my internal debate.

"I've noticed," Phil jokes. "What about?"

 _ **This is your chance! DO IT!  
DON'T! Think about the possible outcomes… BAD!**_

 _ **Or very, very, good.**_

My mind and feelings battle to win but I've already made my choice.

"About us." The words slip out and once I say them the two little voices submit to silence.

Phil sits up waiting for more. "How so?"

I review what I've practiced dozens of times. "I like you and you like me right?"

He nods. "Yeah, and…..?"

"Do you want to be-" before I can finish his lips are on mine.

"I think this answers your question." He says quickly before his lips touch mine again.

I don't move in shock at first but then slowly come out of it and I kiss him back. The outcome of the question was very good after all.


	40. School

Hey guys this one is short but it's a replacement for the chapter here before *shrugs* that one wasn't good and I did better this time. Sorry for the kinda cliche ending. ~gum wrapper.

I still (and never will) own the rights to Dan Howell and Phil Lester(And I co-own Tilly! but I is sad now cuz I'm not allowed to dab:,( gum wrapper deleted it *dabs anyway* shhhhhhh no one tell gum wrapper that I dabbed ~SuperFanGirl21)

* * *

School

Tilly's p.o.v.

I glance around the dark blue classroom at the other twelve year olds. I watch them whisper to their parents about being embarrassing. I smirk. My parents don't even know about career day.

One adult talks after another. I doodle all over a new page in my notebook.

"Tilly, are you paying attention?" The teacher snaps.

I look over at her. "What?"

There's snickers.

"I asked if your parents were coming."

I shake my head and say no.

She mutters something and I wish I could have heard it.

As the day goes on, as people discuss how cool certain people's parents are, I start to wish I could have Daddy or Papa come to talk about being a YouTuber because that is better than a store manager for sure.

I also am left out of the conversations at lunch.

When we get back to class the teacher (a little gnome-like person with almost no hair) asks me "Tilly, do you want to tell us what your parents do?"

"Yeah." I mumble. "Sure."

I walk to the front of the room with only three pairs of eyes on me.

"My parents aren't like normal parents." I start off. "They don't have a normal job that goes to work every day at the same time."

I look up from the floor and see I now have the entire class's attention.

"They are YouTubers." I smile a little. "To be specific, the YouTubers AmazingPhil and danisnotonfire."

Murmurs go through the classroom. Somebody raises their hand.

"Um, yes?" I ask.

"Like, the danisnotonfire and AmazingPhil?"

I nod. "Yes? Was that a trick question?"

More whispers. Another hand.

"Yeah?"

"Do you think you could have them come sometime? In person?"

If I told them they could. I think. "Maybe."

"Class!" The teacher shouts as more people raise their hands and shout at me. "Let her talk."

She is ignored.

I shrug and someone shouts "are they really like six feet tall?"

"Well, I used to compare them to trees." I comment before more people ask more questions.

"Do you help make their videos?"

I think for a moment. "Sometimes."

"Do you get annoyed when people ask about them? Is that why they didn't come today?" A voice says softly from the front.

"I don't get annoyed. I understand that their fans just wanna meet them." I mumble.

Finally I've answered more questions than double my class's number and the teacher just gives up on trying to control her class.

Three people have their phones out and several people are gathered around each person watching a video.

I smile as I sit back down at my desk. I was worried my class would think they're boring or something worse but I was wrong. They love the biggest dorks in the world… but not nearly as much I do.


	41. Bad Mood

_This one's kind of short but it gets the point across. Enjoy. ~ gum wrapper._

 _THIS IS ACTUALLY FANTASTIC (also same Dan, I feel you) ~SuperFanGirl_

 **I'm not claiming that any of this is real and I don't own the people mentioned.**

* * *

 _Dan's p.o.v._

 _Bad Mood_

Phil puts a gray blanket around me and him so we're protected from the outside world.

"You're thinking too hard about something." Phil says softly. "You're forehead is creasing."

"It's not!" I protest as he taps my forehead.

"Yes it is. What are you thinking about?"

I sigh and give in to his worried face. His kind of blue eyes are very dark and it scares me a little. "I'm not good at anything Phil. I'm worthless."

"You are nowhere near worthless." Phil says wrapping me in a hug.

I shrug. "That's debatable."

"Daaaaan."

"Yes?" I mumble.

Phil kisses my head. "Stay here. I'll be right back."

I frown as he leaves me sitting under a blanket by myself. I'm beginning to think he abandoned me when he returns with maltesers and a grin.

"You can't perk me up with chocolate."

Phil shrugs. "Maybe not but it'll help."

I eat one and he smiles happily.

"Dan you are my favorite person in the world. You are my best friend and if you think you're worthless well you're wrong because you mean a lot to me. You are the center of my universe and I'm pretty sure that means you're worth something."

I want to point out how cheesy that was but I don't. It was actually rather sweet and I love him for it.

"Phil… that was like something from a movie."

"Don't hate on my speech. I was trying to make you feel better."

I laugh and lean over so my head is on his shoulder. "It worked a bit."

"Only a bit!?" He cries.

I give the blanket a crooked grin. "Well maybe more than a bit… but the chocolate helped too."

Phil gives me a fake annoyed look. "Next time I'll just leave you with the chocolate than."

To make a point I eat another. Phil sighs and shakes his head which shakes the whole blanket. I look at him carefully before allowing my lips to find his. His lips are warm.

"You taste like chocolate." He comments pulling away after a second.

I smile and shrug. "But you don't mind."

"Not really." He says before kissing me again.

I kiss him back happily. My previous mood of despair has long faded.


	42. Nothing Close to Awful

_PHIL FINALLY HAS FOUR MILLION SUBSCRIBERS! Maybe I'll write another chapter on that? Also, sorry I've been MIA but I've been busy this past month. ~gum wrapper._

 **I don't own Dan and Phil clearly.**

* * *

Nothing Close To Awful

 _Dan's p.o.v._

My heart pounds wildly in my chest. Phil looks so… _perfect_ right now. I steal a glance at his lips very quickly. I almost have the courage to do it.

"Dan?"

My voice shakes. "Y-yeah?"

Phil smirks. "You looked at my lips again."

"O-oh. Sorry."

He leans closer to me on the couch. I force myself to look at his brightly printed shirt instead of his smooth lips.

"What's wrong? You aren't acting normal… you're all jumpy."

I shake my head as I feel my face grow warm and flush with color. "Nothing… Nothing's wrong." Which isn't a lie. Nothing is _wrong_.

Phil's head comes to a rest on my shoulder. I look down at him when he isn't looking.

I have to kiss him. I absolutely have to.

"Dan, I love you."

I almost can't answer him. It's like he knows what I want to do and is purposely making it harder.

"I-I love you too Phil."

He looks up at me. Now could be my chance.

"What are you thinking about? You seem distracted." Phil mumbles which is a very un-Phil like thing to do.

I adjust my position and he sits upright. "I'm thinking about… How I can't… That I won't let… That I'm going to…" I restart my sentence enough times for him to tell I'm flustered.

"You won't let what happen?"

I don't answer. I lean forward instead. We're now a mere inch apart. Phil now realizes what I'm so worked up about. His nose touches mine lightly. I let out a shaky breath. Now I have to do it. There's no turning back. I have to kiss Phil.

"Phil would it be okay if I maybe…" I turn my head slightly and push my lips against his very gently.

He kisses me back immediately. He also responds by moving his hand to the back of my neck so I can't move too far away from our current position.

My stomach flips over and the world disappears as all of my senses focus only on Phil and our kiss.

We both draw back for a breath but his forehead rests on mine.

"Well," Phil laughs.

I smile at the pink creeping across his face.

"Um… haha…" I bite my bottom lip. "Was it awful?"

Phil tilts my head and I let his lips find mine again for a short kiss before he whispers "that was nothing close to awful."


	43. Red Thread

_Excuse "the new voldemort" below. I let her do what she wants 'cause I love her. ~gum wrapper._

 _ **HEY Y'ALL WHAT'S THE HAPS, ISN'T THIS A GOOD CHAPTER :D ~The new Voldemort**_

 _I don't own Dan or Phil or this idea._

* * *

 _Red Thread (_ _ **asdfghjkl I LOVE THIS AU, BASICALLY NO ONE WRITES IT THO!**_ _)_

 _Dan's p.o.v._

I tug at the red thread tied around my left ring finger. It seemingly ends after an inch or two but everybody knows that the string doesn't actually end there. Somehow it connects you to that one person but all it's ever done for me is be something to play with when I'm bored or nervous.

"Dan I don't know why you're so upset about going to see a play with us. I thought you liked plays." My mother sighs.

"Yeah but what if I see someone there from school? I'm too awkward to say hi so we'd just be aware of each other but not acknowledge it."

Dad laughs. "Most likely nobody from your school will be there. Who wants to see a play on a friday night?"

Mum playfully hits his arm. "You do! Now get in the car!"

The yarn on my finger keeps me occupied the whole car ride there as I twist it around my finger and then pull it. Luckily I don't have to sit with my parents so I sit in the back as far away from anyone as possible. My plan is ruined within minutes.

The seats fill until I'm barely "alone" anymore.

"Hi."

My head snaps to my right. Someone my age is standing beside me.

"Um… I'm Phil… Could I sit with you? There's nowhere else really."

 _No._ "Uh, yeah. Why not?"

Phil sits next to me the light falls across his face just right. I wrap the yarn around my finger nervously while I examine his face in the shifting light. I can see his creme skin, dark black hair that falls into one of his eyes, his perfectly shaped lips, his odd yet beautiful eyes that might be light grey but are perhaps a watery light blue with some other colors mixed in... they don't have a crayon that matches his eye color so I'm sure of the exact way to describe them.

I realize I'm staring at him but he's staring back so I stare for a bit longer.

"Oh, my name's Dan." I say waking up to the world again as he blinks and looks to the ground.

Phil smiles. "That's a nice name."

The lights go out and the play starts but I look over at him anyway to see if I can catch a glimpse of his beautiful face again.

I put my hand on the arm of the seat and find his there. I move mine away to play with my red soulmate string again. I'm shocked to find it's not a tiny piece of thread anymore.

I know what this means. I'm close enough to my soulmate for our thread to connect.

My heart beats loudly. I wonder if anyone else can hear it.

"Dan?" Phil whispers. I can tell he's leaning close to me.

"Yes?" I whimper.

"I can hear your heart beating like you're about to have a heart attack."

I almost laugh at him. Maybe I could make a joke out of it?

Phil moves his hand and the string on my finger is pulled. I jump.

"Did you just-"

"Wait move your hand-"

We stare at each other in the dark. I can only make out his eyes as they reflect the little amount of light in our corner.

"Dan, I think you're string is connected to mine." Phil whispers.

I nod even though he probably can't see me. "And that means we're…"

"Soulmates." We whisper together.

My fingers pull the string into my lap. The line gets tighter until another pair of fingers finds mine.

"Dan, we're definitely soulmates."

I nod.

"What's wrong? Do you not want me to be your soulmate?"

"No, that's not it. I'm just a little amazed. I thought tonight was gonna be boring and pointless."

Phil shifts his position. "And was it?"

He's still holding my hand. I tighten my hold on his hand. "Tonight is probably the best night of life so far."


	44. Nail Polish

_Who here remembers that time Dan painted his nails black? *people raise hands* Great! I'm just gonna write fic on it. :) Also, sorry I've been MIA I'm just not having any genius ideas lately I have finals next week. ~gum wrapper._

 **I'm not saying any of this is real and I don't own the people mentioned except for Tilly.**

* * *

 _Nail Polish_

 _Phil's p.o.v._

Even though we were on tour for TATINOF, we brought Tilly along. She was content enough to hide away from the usually loud people which worked out well so nobody would see her.

"Daaaaaaaaaddy! Paaaaaapaaaaaaa!" Tilly shouts. "Wake up!"

Dan doesn't stir but I sit up as Tilly scrambles up onto the bed her face radiating with excitement despite it being seven in the morning and a rare day off for us.

She plops down between me and Dan and puts two tiny bottles on the bed. One is a sky blue and the other is neon pink.

"Daaaaaaaaddy?" Tilly asks with a sly smile. "Can I paint your nails? Please?"

I shrug. "Sure Til."

She opens the sky blue bottle and instantly the chemically smell (unlike that of pool only slightly) fills the room.

Tilly paints just the nails on my left hand before she gets bored. I'm unsure of what to do now.

"I'm all done!" She announces proudly which causes Dan to wake.

"What about my other hand?:

Tilly shrugs and closes her bottle. "I'm bored." She crawls over Dan in an attempt to get off the bed.

"Why does it smell so chemically?" Dan asks yawning and trapping Tilly in a hug.

Tilly grins. "I painted Daddy's nails… Can I paint yours pink?"

"Nope and definitely not if you are only going to paint one hand."

She frowns. Dan frowns too. He hates it when she's unhappy.

"Okay look. I'll make you a deal," Dan says giving in. "You can paint my nails if you promise to do all ten of my nails."

She nods. "Promise."

"And you paint them black."

She scowls. Her eyebrows coming together and her eyes darkening. "I don't have black polish!"

"What a problem." Dan says looking more relieved than disappointed like Tilly.

 ***~* *~* *~* time skip 'cause I'm lazy *~* *~* *~***

A few days later it was safe to say Tilly wasn't giving up on this. She desperately wanted to paint Dan's fingernails and brought it up whenever she could.

Dan managed to avoid her pleads by reminding her she didn't have any to which she demanded he buy some. His answer was a solid no every time.

Then a girl gave dan a bottle of black nail polish.

His eyes went straight to me and I could see in his eyes he knew Tilly would have to paint his nails now if I told her. I only give him a smile.

As soon as we make it back to Tilly she plants a kiss on my nose as I pick her up.

"Hey what about me?" Dan asks tickling the bottoms of her bare feet.

She looks him over carefully. "Can I paint your nails?"

Dan's hot cocoa eyes meet mine. "Uhh, no."

"Whyyyyyyyy?" Tilly asks pouting. She rests her head on my shoulder and turns away from Dan.

I play with her hair as I say "guess what Til" softly.

"What."

"Somebody gave him nail polish today."

That perks her up.

"It's black." I add.

"Phiiiiiil." Dan sighs.

Tilly looks at Dan slowly. "Can I paint your nails now?"

He simply pulls the bottle from his pocket and gives her his left hand.

 ***~* *~* *~* the next day *~* *~* *~***

"Hey silly-Tilly can I take off my nail polish now?" I hear Dan ask while helping Tilly brush her curly brown hair.

"No Papa."

"But I need to."

There is a few seconds of silence.

"Okay! I'll keep it on!" Dan cries.

I can hear her smile when Tilly speaks. "Thank you Papa."

So Dan wears the polish all day. Even when we meet some people afterwards and he _said_ he was going to take it off before.

It's not long before people notice his black nails. Dan complains to Tilly as everybody freaks out on the internet.

"Can I paint your nails again Papa?"

"NO."


	45. Date Me Again

_Hey, I'm back for a test run after being kidnapped by the musical fandoms! Did anyone miss me? No? Didn't think so..._

 **I don't own Daniel Howell or AmazingPhil obviously.**

 _Phil's p.o.v._

"I'm sorry; no."

Dan's face immediately melts into a heartbroken mess. His eyes fall to his socked feet in the cold tile and his shoulders slump foreword.

"O-oh... okay, yeah." He mumbles almost too softly to hear. "I knew I shouldn't have asked and now things might be awkward-"

I prevent dan from speaking anymore by slowly, timidly, taking his right hand. He looks up at me in confusion. His forehead creases but his eyes are darkened.

"Things won't be awkward." I promise interlocking our fingers so that that my pinky is last in line. His hands are ice from the nerves. "There's no reason for it to be awkward between us."

"What do you mean? I just asked you if you'd like to date me and you _turned me down."_ Dan's voice cracks and he barely gasps out the last three words.

"Dan Howell, I wouldn't like to date you because I'd be overjoyed to date you again. I'd be ecstatic to be able to hug you longer and tighter again. I'd give anything to be able to kiss your beautiful lips again. Don't say like, that's such an understatement you can't possibly imagine."

As the words sink into Dan he perks back up. His hand tightens around mine then he reach for my other but I beat him to connect our hands.

"You shouldn't have left me hanging you absolute spork! I was crushed!" He exclaimes.

I lean my forehead against his. "You forgive me?"

Dan nods. "Yes, of course. I can never stay mad at you."

"I know. That's why I did it." I giggle.

"You're lucky I love you." He threatens moving his head so our lips are inches apart.

I hum a response. "Are you going to kiss me or what?"

My answer isn't a spoken one but instead his lips press onto mine.


	46. Soulmate Sentences

_Heh, sooooooo... should I return?~gum wrapper_

 _ **Still don't own Dan and Phil as they are human beings!**_

 _Phil's p.o.v._

Since I was 4 I had a sentence on the inside of my left wrist: The first sentence my soulmate will ever say to me.

My mother wouldn't tell me what it said when I was young because my soulmate... my soulmate has a rather strong vocabulary word in there.

 _Oh fuckity fuck, I'm bleeding!_

I trace the words with my right pointer finger. The swirling, loopy, thin, black letters have entranced me for years. What happens? Why does my soulmate apologize to me first thing?

"PHILIP! You're going to be late on your first day! Get down here!" My mum calls from downstairs.

Hurriedly, I scan the room and find my bag. I stuff random light blue notebooks into it then burst out of my room and noisily stumble down the stairs.

"Bye! Love you!" I shout over my shoulder as I throw open the front door and trip my way to the front gate.

Once I'm on the bus I realize someone is staring at me. I look over at the brown haired boy. He peers over a Harry Potter book to look at me.

He must be a transfer... I've never seen him before and he's rather noticeable with those brown eyes.

I almost say something to him but then we meet eyes and he _winks!_ My words leave me and I simply turn to look out the window. _I am not flustered_

I lose the boy when we all get off at school. I look for him but there are too many other students in the way. I grumble to myself as the bell rings and dig out my class list.

First up? Science.

I'm on of the last ones into the room and I slink to a desk in the back. I plop myself down into a chair and try to pay attention to the grading system but after 11 years of this I honestly can only give 40% of my attention.

Then someone is sitting beside me. It's him! He smiles.

I smile back timidly.

"OOOOOOOkay class! As you can see there are two sets of shears in your desk. Please each take one then got cut a sample of leaf from the plants I have in the back of the room. I'm going to give you a test on plant cells just as a refresher!"

I take a pair of scissors, they're open so I go to close them. Suddenly there's a finger and I've cut it.

"Oh fuckity _fuck!_ " Brown eyed boy cries. "I'm bleeding."

Suddenly, I'm not concerned about my hand... at least not all of it. I know those words, those five words I've memorized and tried to picture the person behind, tried to hear in my mind.

 **I gotta say something flirty and impressive!**

I don't say anything. Brown haired boy simply goes up to the professor and shows him the cut.

I'm to walk Dan to the nurse. Dan... that's a splendid name.

"Are you mute? You didn't talk earlier in the bus either."

I sputter but no words form. He has me speechless.

We walk to the office, Dan's finger slowly stops bleeding and as we approach the office he suddenly turns to me.

"Are you okay?"

"No I'm not at all okay because I've ruined it and you'll never want to talk to me now because I'm so clumsy!" I almost whine as I speak in one long run-on sentence.

Dan's eyes light up. "It's you!"

"It's me?"

"You're my soulmate!" He gives me a confused look. "Unless you have a soulmate?"

I shake my head wildly. "N-no! You're my soulmate."

Dan suddenly looks down. "I swore at you!"

A bubbly laugh escapes my lips. "Yes, I've walked around with the words 'fuckity fuck' on my wrist... as a general warning my whole family thinks you're going to be a bad influence."

We share a laugh as I pull open the door to the office. Upon seeing the blood the nurse gives Dan a band aid and then we shuffle back out of the office.

"So what's your name, soulmate?" He asks as we make our way back to the science room.

"Phil, Philip for long."

Dan slips his bandage pinky finger around my nonbandaged pinky.

"Phil, Philip for long, would you want to date me?"

I answer with a huge grin. "Fuckity fuck yes."


	47. Why

_How many days in a row can I keep this up? Let's see! My New Year resolution was to write more fluff and more gaaaaay *coughs* Anywho, on with the disclaimer! ~ gum wrapper._

 **Dan Howell and Phil Lester are their own beings I don't own them...**

 _Dan's p.o.v. (They don't live together in this!)_

 _Message from Philly:_ Dan! Dan!

 _You:_ what's happened? Did you burn something?

 _Philly:_ No, it snowed!

I pull the checkered duvet back up to my chin and wait for another message.

 _Philly:_ Wanna go somewhere?

Why do I want him to say it can be a date?

 _You:_ I'll meet you at the same park as always in twenty minutes?

I get a smiley face back. I hurry to dress myself in the typical Dan Howell fashion: black jeans and a random shirt.

I snarf down some cereal then pull on my coat and am out the door. My phone chimes to alert me Phil must be there.

 _Philly:_ Did you bring gloves? It's cold!

 _You:_ nope

I slip my phone back into my pocket and walk at a brisk pace. It is in fact freezing.

I reach the park to see Phil already running around catching the falling snowflakes.

Once he sees me he comes bouncing over in his coat, too floppy hat and his long woolen Hufflepuff scarf.

I almost have a heart attack from how cute and attractive he looks as he waves at me. Why do I want that hand to hold mine?

"Come on, Dan! Try to catch a snowflake in your tongue!"

What I'm going to catch is a cold. There's a reason nobody else is outside.

I try for Phil to catch a snowflake until I turn around to be greeted with a magical sight.

His hat is falling over his eyes, his bangs have caught more snowflakes than me and he's spinning around and around looking up at the sky. His scarf flaps around in the bitterly cold wind but he seems unaffected. Phil is in his own world, his own peaceful and snowy world... why is it a world I desperately want to be a part of?

His lips part ever so slightly and I see his breath come out in a magnificent cloud. Everything about him is magnificent- err, _amazing._

I take a small step forward in the light snow. Phil smiles this soft and almost relaxed smile than makes my insides melt and flip and everything is jittery. Why do I want to kiss him?

Suddenly, his eyes drop from the tree tops to see me. His chapped lips break into a bigger grin. "Your nose is red!"

I tap my nose. "My whole face is numb."

"We should go in." Phil suggests half heartedly.

I'm tempted to say no so he can stay outside in this beautiful winter landscape and take my breath away.

"You can stay at my place." I offer to keep him from leaving me. "I have hot cocoa."

He nods. As we leave the park he blows on his fingers to try to warm them.

I carefully reach over and take his hands away from his mouth. I slip his hands around my and into my coat. Phil is forced to hug me but he laughs as his cold fingertips press into my ribs in an oddly comforting way.

"Walk backwards... this way we'll be warm." I propose ignoring the somersaults and flips my insides are performing. Why do I want him to never let me go?

He nods and we stumble back to my flat.

"It's warm in here." Phil sighs in relief.

"I thought I'd lost all feeling." I mumble.

Phil ransacks the kitchen and starts to make the cocoa. I follow softly after once I force myself to relax.

As I enter the kitchen Phil is singing a little song about cocoa. I smile and watch amusedly from the doorway.

"You're cute." I blurt.

Phil laughs at my comment. "You're not to bad yourself there Danny."

I feel like I might throw up. "Right. I'm super attractive."

Phil shrugs with his back to me as he stirs a mug. "I'd say so."

My heart stops. Why is that exactly what I wanted him to say?

"You what?" My voice cracks awkwardly. I cringe.

Phil spins around and our faces end up mere centimeters apart. Why do I want him to come a little closer?

"Kiss?" He asks.

"W-what?" I feel my face heat up with embarrassment.

"Can I kiss you?"

Why am I going to say yes?

"Yes. Yes you can kiss me. Please kiss me." I almost plead for him to simply connect our lips.

He leans forward just enough to lightly press our cold lips together. He tastes faintly of cocoa so I imagine he's already had a taste of the sweet warm liquid. It feels like the world is frozen right now and the only point of life is our lips. He moves just a little bit it's enough and I never want him to break this connection. I try to relay how much he means to me in this one kiss but it doesn't work. We both pull away to breathe before I make our lips meet again. I worry I might be kissing too hard and try to be more gentle when I kiss him a third time.

"Come on, the cocoa is gonna be colder than outside if we don't stop."

Why does this upset me? Why do I want to kiss him again and again until he understands how much I need him?

"I love you Dan."

Oh, that's why.

"I love you too."


	48. Meeting

**Dan and Phil aren't mine. Don't own them. Y'all know that by now.**

 _Don't forget: optometrist appointment at 4 today!!_

I frown at the note on the back of my hand. Why is my soulmate so forgetful that they have to write everything on _me_? I wish I knew who they were so I could tell them to stop writing their important information on me. Do they not own paper?!

 _Also don't forget: Dr. Charlie, Clearmont Street!_

Waaaaait. Wait. I know where that office is! I know where my soulmate is going to be! I can meet them!

I've never responded to anything my soulmate has written over the past... 16 or so years. I'll draw shapes when I'm bored in class and they'll write down important information but unlike most people, we've never communicated via our skin.

I glance up at the clock: it's two. I can hardly hold still with nervous anticipation so I pace around my kitchen. Am I really going to do this? Am I really going to just show up there and look for someone... how will I know who it is?!

By the time I formulate a plan it's three thirty and the walk is 20 minutes from my house so I pull on my coat and step into the chilly early spring air.

 _What do I do if they don't like me? What if they don't want to see me? Maybe that's why we've never properly spoken! Oh no, this was a hug mistake!_

I pull open the door and tell the clerk I'm waiting for someone to come in. She lets me sit and wait.

A middle aged woman with four young boys trailing behind her enters. Definitely not any of them.

Another woman enters. This one has a boy around 19 with dark hair keeping close on her heels. I slip out a sharpie from my pocket.

 _ **Hey, sorry I've never said something before.**_

 _Hi?_ The boy is blocked from my view behind his mother. I scowl.

 **What do you look like soulmate?**

 _Nothing interesting. Black hair, blue eyes, pale skin._

 **Did you make it to your optometrist in time?**

 _Yeah, there now why?_

I pull my sleeve down over our conversation as the boy and woman turn around. The boy eyes me curiously as I pretend to type away feverishly on my phone. He then shakes his head and mumbles something to his mother.

I meet his eye once as I pretend to stretch. _Blue eyes!!_

I go back pretending to type. Instead I watch the boy. He pulls out a washable marker and wrote something on his hand.

 _You're staring. At least try to be subtle next time._

"Philip Lester?" A man asks from the door.

The boy passes by me, his mother hardly looking up from the novel she's reading, and he winks.

I feel heat rise to my face and feel my stomach twist and I _know_ Philip Lester is my soulmate.

 _Meet me at the Starbucks down the street in 30?_

 **Absolutely.**

I grin, and stand to introduce myself to his mother as her future son-in-law.


	49. Promposal?

_Greatest Showman anyone? Now, a 21 Chump Street based chapter... might make this into a story... look out for that. ~gum wrapper._

 **I don't and never will, own the rights to Dan and Phil. I also am not Lin-Manuel Miranda so... I own none of this.**

 _Dan's p.o.v._

It was the last month before graduation and then I'd have been free to university and I couldn't have cared less if it weren't for the transfer student.

Philip Lester. _Whoa._ Now there was beauty.

He had light skin, dark hair, and had lips I desperately wanted to kiss.

That's not the only reason I liked him though! He said he moved from New York to England with his mother... well so had I... so I decided to say hi.

He seemed mature so we talked more and I was like... daaamn. He's smart _and_ handsome.

So I got his number. We texted night and day, I trusted him right away too. He listened to all my problems and I let him copy all my homework (though he usually let me copy his because I always fell asleep or just stopped paying attention in class).

I was falling hard and fast for transfer student Phil Lester. So one day, I laid it all on the line.

I said, "What the heck I gotta do to be with you?"

And he said no. Didn't even answer the question just said no.

Yeah I was surprised too. I mean, I'm a pretty great guy!

So a few more weeks pass. There's only a week left until prom.

I get up in front of the whole class one day and serenaded him! I danced and everything! I was like "what the heck I gotta do to be with you?! Tell me who I gotta be, for you to be with me!"

This time, he said he'd think about it.

Yes! He'd think about it!


	50. Late Night

**Same disclaimer as always.**

 _Phil's p.o.v._

"Dan, you can't live off coffee forever." I chide.

He ignores me.

"Daaaaaaan."

"Daniel."

"Danny."

I throw a sock at him, considering maybe playing "Hello Internet" to get attention.

"What was the for?!" He glares at me as he throws it back.

"I've been trying to get your attention! You need to go to sleep. It's one in the morning. I've tried to get to you come to bed maybe four times!"

He shrugs. "I'm working on something."

"Like what?"

"Something."

I narrow my eyes. He said he'd be done by now. "Do you wanna watch something with me?"

"No. I need to work."

I frown. "You want me to make you something to eat?"

"No."

"You want me to leave you alone?"

"Yes actually."

I ignore the slight hurt I feel at that. "Fine! I'm going to bed. You can work to death. You've been working for almost six hours!"

He finally looks up. "Sorry... I've been getting distracted."

I shrug. "Night Dan."

"Wait! Phil!"

I'm already in our room. I pull back the blankets before crawling into the bed. For a moment I think I hear Dan but he doesn't come into the room. I sigh then slip off my glasses.

I'm half asleep when two arms snake around me from behind and pull me into an embrace.

"Dan?" I mumble through a yawn rolling onto my other side to see him.

"Shhh, go back to sleep." His arms wrap around my waist and pull me closer to his chest. "I was just fixing the blanket."

In the dark I can hear his heartbeat and his breathing. It's peaceful and comforting.

"I love you." He whispers. I'm not sure if he knows I'm awake or not. He tightens his arms around me.

It's not until later, around five in the morning, do I realize that he has joined me. I smile lazily and sit up a little. Some of his curls have grown out and flop into his eyes. I gently, as to not wake him, move them out of my view. He looks so relaxed.

His eyes may be closed and he may have a little drool going on but he's cute.

I lay my head back down next to his and watch his chest expand then deflate over and over. I place one of my hands on his chest. I can feel his heart as it beats strong and steady.

"Morning, Philly." Dan's voice is husky sounding from sleep. "I don't have any work to do today. We can do whatever you'd like."

I hum, snuggling back into his chest, "let's just stay here then."


	51. Eventually

_Go check out my new fic! It's going to be multi-chapter and usually updated once a week! This update here is sad but_ _Colored Souls_ _should be much more chipper. It doesn't really fit phan but this update is dedicated to anyone in a long distance relationship, my heart truly goes out to y'all 3 ~gum wrapper._

 _Long Distance_

 _Phil's p.o.v._

Nobody likes goodbyes whether it be to a friend, family member, or significant other. In my case, it's a common occurrence.

Dan's eyes don't meet mine as he puts his phone down.

"Come on, what time is it?" I ask again.

"You have to leave in a half hour," his voice is hollow.

Something in my chest constricts painfully. This never gets easier.

"What if... what if you don't go?" He mumbles, wrapping his arms around me. I fall backwards onto the bed with him. "What's the worst that could happen?"

I smile but it's halfhearted. We both know I can't stay.

We simply lie on the bed, arms around each other, trying to get as much possible time in as we can, until the time comes where I have to leave. I sit up and he frowns.

I run a hand through his dark curls, he didn't straighten them today, and place a kiss on his forehead. My lips stay on his skin for just a second longer than necessary.

The walk to the front door is kin to that of a funeral march. No word can come out of my mouth, I'm thinking too fast. We're running out of time and I don't know what I want to say. I want to say everything but there is so little time.

Slowly, Dan looks at me, his brown eyes looking straight into my blue ones before his arms are back around me.

"I love you, Phil." He mumbles into me as he holds me tightly against him.

My voice hardly exists as I say it back, "I love you too."

There's a pause, a lull where I should pull away from his warm embrace and leave, but every molecule tells me- no, _begs_ me -to stay exactly as I am.

 _Please don't make me have to let go. Please, please, please, don't make me have to let go of him._

And then I feel the warm tears I thought I could hold back run down my face. I'm suddenly glad he can't see my face while we're hugging.

Dan squeezes me tighter for just a moment and I dig my fingers into the hood of his sweatshirt. I need a better hold on him. I need to be sure he's safe and alive and here while I can.

 _I can't let go yet, I'm not ready to say goodbye again._

He pulls away to see my face. His own face as stunning as ever and I swear he looks like an angel. I poke one of his dimples to distract myself from having to part with him.

"You're crying," he notes sadly.

"I'm not ready to go yet."

He closes his eyes before giving me one last tight hug. I hold him to me as tight as possible.

 _Please, dear God do not make me have to let go._

Dan's lips meet mine and I almost can't kiss back because I'm so utterly heartbroken over leaving him yet again.

"Text me when you get home okay?" His face is too close to mine for me to see properly so I close mine and let my forehead rest against his.

There's nothing I can do to stall time any longer. I have to go now. "I will."

"I love you." Dan moves away so it's only our hands that connect us still. I already miss him and I'm still looking at him.

"I love you too." There's nothing connecting us anymore.

 _There's so much distance so soon, he is already so far away from me._

"Hey," Dan's left hand cups my face, "I promise we'll see each other again soon okay?"

A promise does nothing to fix the problem now but I nod and smile. "Soon."

Once I'm in the car and moving further away, putting more distance between us I try to focus on only getting home and not on the boy I've left behind me.

 _Eventually, it won't be like this._ I remind myself. _Eventually you'll move in together and you won't have to go weeks without him._

Eventually is so far away.


	52. Distance

_hi._

 _bye._

 _~gum wrapper._

 _Dan's p.o.v._

I hadn't exactly thought about it much, what I'd do if Phil got tired of us being DanandPhil with no space... but it's all I've got to think about now.

It was casual, said as if it wouldn't destroy everything I've come to know, when he told me one morning.

"Dan, I think I want to stop being Dan and Phil as a brand... I want my own space."

He left the next day.

Two months later, here I am, staring at Phil from across a street like he might be a figment of my imagination.

He is by himself, walking with his head down and hood up but I know it's him. I could pick him out of a crowd if I was blind. We just automatically attract to each other.

"Phil!" I call out, desperate for his voice to fill my ears and surround me with that happy warm feeling once more. "Phil, stop!"

He turns and I catch a glimpse of his blue eyes but it doesn't last long. He picks up the pace after seeing me.

"Phil! Phil please, I want to talk to you!" I practically run after him (and for someone who doesn't run often, I move pretty fast to catch up).

He sighs when I step in front of him.

"Yes?"

"Why haven't you even looked at my messages? I thought you might be hurt or sick or something!" This is the first time I've gotten confirmation that he is in fact alive since he left.

"I don't want to talk to you."

"Can't we just go back to being friends? I don't even know what happened!"

He tries to step around me. I move to block him.

"Dan, let me by."

"Tell me why you quit being my friend, why you quit talking to me, why you haven't put one video on your channel since you left, why aren't you Phil Lester anymore?"

His shoulders slump forward. "Dan, not now."

"Not now? When then?" I can't let him go again, what if he goes back to not existing?

"I left because I couldn't stand to face you everyday."

"What? What are talking about? What happened? What did I do?"

Phil laughs, not the happy sound I was craving, but a darker one.This has an affect on me as though I've been punched in the stomach.

"I cannot stand to go through everyday right beside you. I thought if I distanced myself the feelings would go away since you don't feel how I do."

I blink, I breathe, and then I let out a laugh of bewilderment.

"I love you more than anything Phil. All those people pointing out every time I look at you aren't crazy." I have the urge to reach out and touch him, to keep him from escaping me again since his eyes are farting around like a caged animal.

My fingers find their way to his face and I hold his head in my hands. He tries to pull away but I don't let him.

"Do you love me Phil?"

His eyes look watery and he does the thing where he can't meet my eyes when he's lying. "N-no. We're just friends."

"Well I love you wether you like it or not."

His blue eyes, their beauty indescribable, flicker up to meet mine. "I... I... Dan."

"Do you love me?"

He nods this time.

"Good, because I am going to kiss you now if you don't mind."

He shakes his head.

I tilt my head just a little and then press my lips to his. He's startled for a moment despite my warning but then kisses me back. I try to get three months of missing him out of this one kiss and he gives me the time back as he leans in for another after I break us apart for air.

"Come on, let's go back to being DanandPhil."

"Yeah, no more distance."


	53. Making Up

_Sorry if my grammar or spelling is off... I've kinda stopped having my "editor" look over my stuff. ~gum wrapper._

Third person p.o.v.

Making Up

When Dan and Phil fight (rarely anything more than a slightly serious exchange of words that's usually resolved with one of them realizing the other has a better point) they both have different ways of handling their emotions.

If it gets to the point where they both can't handle it anymore, Dan yells. Despite him trying not to, he ends up getting very loud very quickly and it's evident on Phil's face when Dan goes too far. Dan hates seeing Phil look scared because of him and when he yells, Phil gives Dan the _silent treatment_. Dan finds this a worse punishment than anything else Phil could do.

Today is no different.

"Phil, come on, I didn't mean it." Dan grabs Phil's wrist before he can escape the room, "I just got a little overwhelmed. I'm sorry I yelled at you."

Phil looks him over once, then shrugs and shakes Dan's hand off and disappears into their bedroom.

Dan racks his brain, trying to think of someway to fix it. He hadn't meant to make Phil worry by staying out until nearly three am after he told Phil that he'd be back by eleven. In all honesty, he didn't think Phil would care.

"Look, I won't do it again. I'll text you if I do stay out later from now on." He's talking to the closed door that separates him from Phil. "I really didn't think you'd notice or care if I didn't come home when I said I would."

His hands lands on the doorknob. It's probably locked, but he feels more secure having something to hold onto. To his surprise, the door swings open.

Phil is facing away from the door, his laptop open on his lap as the screen shines onto his face. Dan comes to sit next to him.

"I know you aren't going to talk to me; I respect that. I'm going to sit here next to you though." A plan slowly forms in Dan's mind.

Phil doesn't even acknowledge him as Dan leans closer. He simply keeps making a list of things he wants to mention in his next video on a document as Dan rests his head on Phil's shoulder. They stay like that for just a little until Dan lifts his head and moves as if he might whisper into Phil's ear.

"You gotta talk to me eventually," His lips touch Phil's temple momentarily, "will this work to get you to talk to me?"

Phil's fingers don't falter for a second on his laptop keys.

Dan takes a different approach. He lets his lips trail down to Phil's jaw. Each kiss only lasts for a fleeting second though.

"How are you still working?" Dan pouts.

Slowly, Dan's lips kiss the side of Phil's. Phil let's out a tiny shaky sigh of annoyance.

"Come on, you want to kiss me back." He taunts his grumpy boyfriend.

Phil mumbles something as Dan takes the computer from Phil's lap and sets it on the bed away from them.

"See, you wanna tell me to stop bothering you don't you?"

Phil's lips twitch up as though he might smile.

"I won't go out so late again." Dan promises as Phil gives in and turns to face Dan.

A hand holds the back of Dan's head as Phil speaks, "if this is how you're going to make it up to me," Phil interrupts himself to give Dan a not-so-gentle kiss, "you can make me worried all the time."


	54. An AU (based off my personal writing!)

_This is a bit from something I've written but I changed the names to work for an AU Dan and Phil! Much different from my usual postings but much better written. Again, excuse any errors, I'm no longer using my editor. ~gum wrapper._

 _Phil's p.o.v._

Carefully climbing down the fire escape, I look down at the ally below to see if Dan might appear with his motorcycle. I jump down onto the rough pavement, careful to not break anything, and I only have to wait five minutes for him to arrive.

"Hey Ginger," he teases.

I have the urge to greet them with a kiss as soon as they hold out a hand to me… but we haven't kissed yet. Sure it's been months that we've been dating but we haven't kissed and I don't want it to be the first kiss right now in an alleyway.

"Must you always greet me that way?" I pretend to pout but actually grin as I clamber onto the bike.

Dan smirks, _holy. fuck. that. smirk._ and nods. "You like it when I call you Ginger."

"Pfft, no!" There's a pause filled with the sound of the rumbling engine before I give in and let him win. "Okay maybe I like it a little when you call me that. Just a little."

As we ride through the city I try to keep my arms loose around Dan. I gawk at all the lights and people and I have to say that night time London is my favorite London. It's much more breathtaking for some reason than day time London.

We stop at a red light and Dan turns his head to me, "you actually snuck out!

"I actually snuck out and I'm going to a party," I confirm.

"With me," he note, "your dad would kill you and everyone you know in a fit of rage if they knew. I can't believe you did this. You're insane."

The idea of my dad knowing about me sneaking out to have fun with Dan makes me laugh, so I do as the light turns green. We take off again and I can't help but let my grin widen. I never want to return to the house with mum and dad. In there it's so cramped and cold, out here it's so big and lively. I feel free. I love it. Being with Dan is so freeing.

He finally slows down (and then stops the motorcycle) outside a huge hotel with nearly every window lit up.

"This is it?"

"This is it… my cousin is a bit of a rich kid. Lives at the top, penthouse. I hate my dad's side of the family."

I make note of that.

Dan takes my hand and leads me inside. I barely take anything in, the world a bright mess of colors and it might be my slight tiredness, but it all seems so close up I can't focus. Dan is pushing me into an empty elevator before I've comprehended anything going on around me.

It's finally bright enough (and my eyes have finally stopped scanning my surroundings like I'm in a movie) to really see him. The street light in the ally wasn't enough to properly illuminate his body. Dan is wearing all black (no surprise) but for some reason the simple worn-out jeans and plain black shirt with his fabulous leather jacket looks even better than normal. Dan looks incredibly good and I want to tell him so but I'm unsure of how to do that without being awkward.

"Must you always stare at me?" There's a smirk to it.

I pull my eyes to his face (mine's probably a dark red) and shrug, "You look good right now. More than normal. I want to kiss you."

Dan slides closer to me, "so why don't you?'

"We're in public." My hands land on the familiar leather of the jacket that's covering his shoulders.

"I don't see anyone else in this elevator do you?"

The statement makes me shiver with a pang of some unnamed emotion.

"N-no. It's just us." My eyes flick up to the number that says what floor we're on, "there's only two floors left before the doors open."

"You could do it anyway." He winks. All my friends hates it when he winks but I think it's cute as hell.

"Don't drink or eat anything, it's all been spiked knowing my cousin," and then, as though it's an afterthought, mutters "Your dad would absolutely kill me if you came home high or drunk so please don't."

We step into the penthouse and I'm hit almost immediately with the smell of alcohol. How did a eighteen year old acquire so much? Why is this so cliche?

Although there is unbearably loud music blasting throughout the large space, not one person is dancing like in those movies. Most people are standing off to the side, leaning against a wall and sipping from various items like beer bottle, plastic cups, and one person has a whole bottle of red wine in their hand. A few people are draped over furniture, making out with the person next to them, others are crying in hallways and corners, and as we make our way through I wonder why anyone would find this fun. It's dark and very weird.

"Here!" Someone yells in my face before handing me a plastic cup filled with… some bright red liquid that I'm not sure I've ever seen before.

Dan removes the cup from my hand instantly.

I'm not sure where we are going but we walk around and around, Dan stopping to talk to people every few feet, and I'm starting to get bored when another plastic cup finds its way into my hand. It looks like plain old water so I take a sip.

Unsurprisingly to probably everyone but me, it is not water. I'm not sure what it is but it is nasty and burns my throat a little as I swallow it.

Dan turns to face me again as I take another sip.

"What did I tell you?! You're underage! Your mom will kill you, your dad will kill you, _I'm_ going to kill you if you take another sip of that!"

I down the rest of the cup without breaking eye contact with them; I nod and place the now empty cup on a table by a couch (with a couple going just a smidge too far for public eye on it).

"Relaaaaaaax, it was gross I'm not having anymore!" I smile to prove I'm okay but he frowns, clearly upset I had anything at all to drink.

After about an hour or so of talking to different people (all wasted or high), Dan opens a door and pushes me onto a balcony. I giggle as he sighs while shaking his head at the sight of me.

"Phil Lester what am I going to do with you?" He steps closer to me and I'm trapped between him and the railing. Well, not trapped, that makes it sound like I don't enjoy being so close to him. Don't get me wrong, I very much enjoying being close to Dan.

"You could kiss me?" I ask hopefully. It crosses my mind briefly that I might be a little drunk. I don't normally have the courage to say something like that without stuttering and fumbling.

"I am not going to kiss you. You're like… super drunk or something."

Unsure of if that claim is true or not, I don't bother to rebuke it. I shrug.

"Only a little. I'm perfectly fine, you can kiss me. Please kiss me."

Dan hesitates, biting his bottom lip with his front top teeth and scanning my face as if looking for a secret code written there in a very small print.

"I'm not going to kiss you. Not here, not like this."

I pout, feeling my bottom lip jut out and my eyebrows come together. I even cross my arms and my gaze falls to the floor. Dan hates it when I pout and usually lets me have my way if I look sad enough.

"Then what if I kiss you?" I question in a teasing way.

"Well then, I guess that'd be okay." I'm amused by how he has dropped his usual cool facade. He's _nervous because I finally am the more dominant one._

Dan is taller than me, as I'm yet to really have a major growth spurt, so I pull his shirt collar and yank him down to my level without a second thought. Our lips smash together almost violently because we are both a little too eager.

My mind is going a million miles an hour but also holding incredibly still. It's impossible to focus on anything but I try to commit to memory how his lips feel in case I never get to kiss them again. Dan's lips are rough but also so very gentle as they press against mine.

When we slowly pull away, my eyes fall to the concert floor of the balcony in embarrassment. My face feels like it's on fire and I try to avoid looking up at Dan because I know he'll say something.

"Hey Ginger," Dan's hand comes up to cup my face and then I'm looking up into his dazzling brown eyes. The normal milk chocolate color of his eyes is nearly taken over by the pupil which has dilated to see better in the oddly dark night air. He's also suddenly regained their flirtatious personality.

"Y-yes?" I'm back to being the shy one.

I'm not sure who exactly moves forward but someone closes the gap between our lips again. We stay together for as long as possible before parting, then kiss again… and again.

A hand is holding one side of my face, I know because I'm holding the wrist attached to it, but otherwise my nerves are in too much of an overdrive to feel anything else. I'm unsure of everything except Dan's lips on mine and his hand on my face. I lose track of how many times we separate for air before kissing again. I'm not sure if this is how everyone's first kiss(es) goes but I think this is pretty amazing and we're both breathless when we decide to stop.

"I really love you," he whispers.

I grin and feel my face heat up even more somehow, "I really love you too."

He leans close again, I tilt my head to the side so our noses don't hit, and I'm just stretching up onto my toes (since I apparently am never growing to a normal teenage boy height) when the door slides open and someone stumbles out onto the balcony with us. Dan spins around with a sigh to find his cousin there.

"Daaaaaaaaaaan!" The person cries, "your date's cute can I kiss 'em too?"

My whole face feels like it's on fire.

"No. Phil's mine." His voice is the scarily intimidating one I remember from before I really knew him. At the statement though, I smile a little. "Come on, it's probably just about time to take you home anyway." The last part is said softer to only me. He slips their hand into mine and then I'm being pulled through the penthouse again without another word or another kiss.


	55. Can’t Love You

_Hi! ~gum wrapper._

Don't own Dan or Phil and they are real people and I'm just using them for your entertainment.

 _Sorry it's angsty, I had planned to write fluff but that changed clearly.)_

Phil Lester was happy. It was his two year anniversary tomorrow and he was just finishing up his surprise for his boyfriend. Dan would love it, he was sure of it.

"Phil?" Dan's voice suddenly cuts through Phil's thoughts as he speaks through the closed door, "Phil I need to talk to you."

 _That's never a good phrase._

"About what?" Phil swings open the bedroom door after making sure to close out of his laptop tabs.

"Um," Dan is looking down at the ground and his hands are playing with each other. Phil's worry increases.

"About... us?"

"What... what about us?" A very large blackhole lands in Phil's gut.

"Listen, I love you, terribly so. You're almost everything I am. I don't know how to describe myself without you. But, Phil, I have... I have to tell you something."

 _He cheated? He murdered? Is it bad to want the murder? He did something stupid and just feels bad about it? He's just having a bad day and needs to get some things off his chest? Yeah, that last one must be it._

"Phil," Dan finds Phil's hands and holds them tightly, "I'm a little conflicted about what to do. I need your help."

 _I'd help him hide a dead body._

"There's the side of me that loves you so much, that cares for you, that wants you and me to love each other and get married and have a life... but _Phil_."

 _Oh fuck, here it comes, something bad. Something terrible._

"You deserve better Phil. There's the side of me that's your firebd. Your friend who is honest and wants what's best for you."

"What are you talking about?" Phil wants him to look up. He wants Dan to look him in the eyes and say it.

"As much as I love you, I want you to be happy. I can't give you everything you should have or everything you deserve. As much as I don't want to hurt you, I think it's best if we maybe... stop it here?" Dan's hands start to let go of Phil's but Phil doesn't let him pull away.

"No. No, you don't mean that."

"I do... I don't... I have no idea," Dan sharks his head and then his eyes flit up to meet Phil's for a second, "I don't think I can love you when I don't even _like_ myself. I need to fix me before I can care for you."

It's almost funny, Dan thinks this will make Phil happier when it actually hurts him more than he ever thought he could be hurt.

"I don't care! I'll love you enough for the both of us."

"Phil."

"Dan."

They're eyes meet and they freeze.

"You don't think you can make me happy?" Phil whispers.

Dan shakes his head.

"You make me happy. All the time. You're so caring and kind and you always ask if something is okay before doing it," Phil starts to trip over his words as he tried to get it out, "I can't change your mind, I don't know if I can, but know that I'll wait until you think you can be in a relationship again. I'm not going to find anyone else."

Dan's eyes water but he quickly blinks it away. Phil resists the need to touch his boyfriend (ex-boyfriend?)'s face because he doesn't know what Dan feels anymore. Maybe he never knew.

"I hope you can forgive me then. I just need to take some time to... to sort myself out. I love you Phil, I really do."

And then Phil can't handle it anymore, he has to do this one last time.

His lips are only one Dan's for a minute at most but it's enough time for Phil to realize just how confused Dan is. At first Dan doesn't kiss back, then he does very hesitantly, and then he pulls away and steps back down the hall. As his hands are ripped from Dan's he only can form one sentence:

"I love you too."


	56. That’s What It Feels Like

**As usual, I don't own Dan and Phil as this is a work of fiction. If you don't know that by now I'm shocked.**

 _Third Person_

 _Alternate Universe Setting_

It was Dan's idea to play Hangman. Ya know the game where you have to spell out a word or two before your stick figure is fully hung by guessing letters of the alphabet.

Dan and Phil sat on a large and warm rock on the side of the lake. A faint, soft summer breeze tossled their hair and Dan's hair was curled up from the humidity and heat. Their feet were placed to permanently dipped into the refreshingly cool blue lake water.

Phil had brought his sketchbook claiming he needed a landscape drawing for his summer art class but so far all he'd drawn were profiles of Dan's face of when had Dan closed his eyes and nearly fallen asleep an hour or three ago.

Now both boys were wide awake.

"We should play a game!"

"Like what? I Spy you got bored of." Phil outlines the hills across from them and works on where the water meets the land at the base of the hills. Dan watches for a moment and feels his mouth fall open slightly to admire the beauty Phil's hands are creating right in front of his eyes.

Dan wonders what other pictures are in the sketchbook.

"Hangman? We can use a scrap piece of paper in your book?"

Phil nods along, tongue poking out of his mouth as he concentrates on his shore line.

"Phiiiiiil!" Dan whines poking the older boy.

"Daaaan," Phil softly mumbles in a teasing manner.

Dan tugs gently on his crush's raven fringe that's been grown out for far too long.

"Fine, fine, we can play a round or two of Hangman." The older boy gives in to the younger one.

They play lazily, putting no real thought into it. Dan slides closer to Phil on the rock and Phil leans into him. A leg goes over another, an arm lands behind a back close enough to brush occasionally and send shivers down a spine, a head rests on a shoulder and eventually no onlooker would be able to tell where one boy began and where the other intersected. The are practically wrapped up in each other... but neither realize just how close they are.

Neither care.

Phil has just won a round by guessing "quell" which was a difficult one but the "ell" part gave it away. Gave it away too quickly for Dan's liking as he had thought that one impossible.

"My turn... then we should probably head back for food. The sun is setting already." Phil mutters. The words barely make a noise leaving his pink lips but Dan is close enough to hear them just fine.

"Three words. Eight letters total." He warns his crush.

"One apostrophe," Dan notes.

They play, Dan quickly getting "I _i_e _ou." but he makes no progress further until he gets the Y with only two errors left.

"I something you?" Dan mutters but the words don't properly register.

Phil yearns to shift the boy off his should so he can look at his milk chocolate eyes and just tell him what the answer is. It's so important Dan know because Phil can't stand holding it in any longer.

"Dan it's easy. It's quite literally in front of your face. How are you so oblivious?" Each word has its double meaning and Phil hopes the implication gets through Dan's sometimes thick skull.

"LIKE!" The word is like! I win!" Dan sits up, scribbling in the last two remaining letters and grins at Phil.

Phil's stomach suddenly is in the Olympic's for gymnastics earning the gold, "read the whole sentence aloud."

"I like you... I like you? What's that mean?" This is one of the times Dan has an impeccably slow brain and it nearly frustrates Phil before he takes a few breaths to gather himself.

"I like you, Dan. As more than a friend. So much more. I have for a while now... a few months?"

Dan gapes at him in the fading sunlight. His brown eyes almost golden with the glow of the last bits of sun.

"I... I like you too!" And in Dan's haste to hug the older boy he throws his body too much and then they're both off the rock and in the water.

"Dan! I'm sopping wet now!" Phil holds Dan tight as the water beyond the rock is deeper than expected.

"Oops?" Dan smiles a bit as he pushes his hand through Phil's wet hair.

"How are we supposed to dry off? We have to walk all the back!" Phil's lost all thought of the moment that took place just s moment ago.

"You could take off your shirt?"

"Daniel Howell!" Phil's face turns a deep crimson. Dan chuckles and moves his face closer to Phil's, silently cursing his shorter height as he has to look up at Phil.

Phil's eyes flit to Dan's parted lips. He can see where Dan has bitten them as there's an indentation of his teeth. He wonders how it'll feel against his lips... against his skin.

The light is dying and the water is lit by the last few rays of golden sun as Phil finds out what those lips feel like.

(The roughness feels painful at first but then he can't help but love it because _that's_ what Dan's lips feel like.)


	57. Nothing Warmer

**I hope y'all know I don't own Daniel Howell and/or Philip Lester.**

 _Third person point of view_

When Dan left the quaint coffee shop he'd found while taking a shortcut back to the new flat, it was pouring rain.

Originally, it was only a light drizzle out. Now rain slammed into the windows and walls of buildings in huge sheets. It nearly toppled Dan over as he trudged home. And to think he had to unpack a million boxes to find dry clothes once we got there.

His phone was ringing. He could somehow hear it over the rain enough to tell it was Phil's tone but he didn't dare to bring it out of the dry inside pocket of his coat.

A gust of wind blew him to his left and he stumbled but managed not to fall or loose the package under his jacket.

Suddenly, something was coming towards him at an alarming speed. It was black and the rain made it difficult to figure out but it was definitely drawing closer to Dan. Was it shouting? Dan thought it might be shouting.

Did bears live in London?

Just as the creature is coming into focus, Dan slips on the soaked concrete. He's just about to land on his ass in the mini river flowing down the pavement when an arm loops around his waist and pulls him forwards. He finds his face in a man's chest.

"Oh! I'm sor-" Dan looks up to find blue eyes.

"What are you doing outside?! I tried to call you to tell you that I'd send an Uber your way!" It's Phil.

Phil caught him.

Dan pulls his head away from Phil and grins a little. "You caught me."

Phil raises an eyebrow, "yes, I did."

"How did you, the clumsiest person on Earth, manage to catch me?"

"Talent!" Phil smiles and Dan notices his face is not wet. Phil seems quite dry actually.

"You caught me... with an umbrella in your other hand?" Dan notices their clear umbrella is in Phil's left hand.

Phil nods. "Now can we go inside? Your hair is dripping and you're going to get sick if we're out any longer."

So the two make their way back to their new flat. They walk as quickly as possible, Dan shivering and leaning into Phil's side for warmth. The umbrella does little to protect their backs from the near sleet but their faces are semi-warm.

Once they get inside Dan rumages through boxes, desperately trying to find towels or clothes or a blanket. His teeth chatter as Phil mumbles something about coffee.

Dan finds some pajamas and a towel then quickly dries off and changes. He takes Phil's duvet off his bed and marches off to find Phil again.

"Hey, I've got some coffee. It's hot, be careful." Phil's voice is softer than normal and it gives Dan a fuzzy feeling as if he's been filled with cotton.

As the brown haired man sips his coffee out of a mug reading, "coffee is my sleep," Phil finds his laptop amongst the mess of their half unpacked boxes and clears off the bed as best as he can.

"Come on," Phil holds his arms open and Dan sets down his mug. He falls into his boyfriend's open arms and shivers against him.

"You're so cold, love." Phil murmurs, wrapping his arms around Dan.

"Sorry."

"No, don't be."

The flat falls silent. Only the sound of the harsh rain exists.

Dan finds it relaxing.

Phil clicks off the only light source- a lamp on the floor next to the bed (they haven't found anything to put it on yet in all the boxes).

They two shift slightly so Dan isn't laying on top of Phil's chest like a dead weight. Phil holds his boyfriend tightly as they listen to the pounding wind.

Phil gives a content sigh as Dan stops shivering and falls asleep.

Nothing warms you up better than cuddles.


	58. I dunno anymore guys

Heyo. I was gonna make this longer but my updating schedule is always wack and that wouldn't be fair to y'all so here's a blurb. It might not make any sense.

Phil is a songwriter- singer.

Dan is just a normal Dan.

This is a work of fiction. I own only the plot.

"What made you change your mind?" Dan asks.

"What?" Phil's head snaps up from looking down at the churning black water below to look over at Dan.

"When we met, all those years ago, what made you change your mind in marrying me?"

"Shouldn't that be obvious?" Phil can't help but wonder what's gotten into his ex lover. "You dumped me the day before our wedding for some old ex who had found you again. Why would I still want to marry you?"

"Because love doesn't just... shut off. Sometimes it's sticks around longer than a person does." Dan's feet sway back and forth over the edge of the bridge. His arms rest on lowest horizontal pole used for the bridge railing.

A moment passes where both men think of the other and what the other might be thinking about. Both are incorrect in their guesses.

"Are you alright?" -Phil

"I'm in love with you still." -Dan

Both stare at the other after their words collide.

"What did you-"

"I'm perfectly fine... what are you talking about?" Dan snaps and effectively cuts off Phil.

"No, what did you just say?"

"Nothing of importance."

The two men stare at the water. It happens a second time.

"I love you too."

"I shouldn't have said anything."

Two pairs of eyes meet. Brown and blue stare each other down. Begging the other to say something to clear up the confusion.

"Dan-"

"Don't. I came here because I thought you wouldn't be." He stands, wanting to be away from the same person he wants to be closest to.

"No! Wait!" The older man grabs his younger counterpart by the wrist (the hand feels far too intimate). "You can't go."

"I think I've done enough. I did leave you right before our wedding and then avoid you... and now I'm here."

"No, Dan, if anything you've hardly done enough." Blue eyes plead with brown eyes silently. How do you ask someone to stay when they don't want to?

Dan scoffs, shaking his head and letting a thin smile grace his lips. "You could have anyone. The world adores you... why pick the one person who you shouldn't want?"

Phil lets go of his counterpart's arm. So this is how it ends then? They tumble and fall and pick themselves back up time and time again just to... lay down themselves.

"There has to be some-"

"I'll see you at your next show." Dan cuts him off. "We can start over. Hook up after every show until eventually I make the worst decision of my life and then we won't speak for three years but I'll still go to every show of yours no matter where they are. We can meet back up at this bridge at the three year exact mark."

"Dan." Condescending.

"Phil?" Curious, confused.

"Where are you going?"

Dan shrugs, "home?"

"Where is that?"

A tiny smile flits onto Dan's round face. "I haven't moved."

"So if I show up around midnight... you'll be there?"

Brown eyes challenge blue. Daring blue to go further.

"You'll be there... alone?"

Brown eyes twinkle under raised eyebrows.

"And if I am... alone?"

"Did your ex stick around or not?" Phil exclaims into the night air. His words float around them in a cloud. Frustration makes the cloud thick.

"No. I'm... I'm not seeing anybody."

"You will be tomorrow morning."

"No. Don't come over. I treated you so ba-"

Blue eyes glare at brown. "You made a mistake. Now I will not let you walk away again or else I'll be making a mistake."

The water under them races past for rivers are always moving and changing. The two take a few steps apart before one speaks.

"You were right. All those years ago. Love can't be controlled by humans." Phil's whisper nearly gets lost in the dark.

"What made you change your mind?" Dan asks, his voice breathless.

"What?" Blue eyes glance up from looking down at the calming black water below to look into soft brown eyes.

"All those years ago, when we first met. You said "love doesn't control me, I control it." You don't believe that anymore so what changed your mind?"

"I couldn't shut off my love for you."


End file.
